Few days ago, I was parading the mall. I went past Express, and you know everything is so attractive in there. I found a skirt I liked, but it was out of my price range, so I’ve been left just dreaming about it. I decided to look around some more. That was when I spotted it.
It was a simple blouse on sale. Curious, I decided to try it on. It fit perfectly — except for one problem: the nipples!
For the record, those are not my nipples. I know my nipples are famous for leading their own way, but for this blouse, this is not me. This blouse has sewn-in nipples that no padded bra, tissue, or iron can eradicate. No wonder they put it on sale.
What kind of nonsense tailor sewed nipple-lookalikes on top of a blouse? Who said I want to walk around looking like I’m about to be occupied? [Pun intended]. So yeah, that was the end of what could have been. It ended before it even had a chance to start. Believe me, I tugged at this blouse many times to see if I could resolve this nipples issue. For someone who has nipples that act out by themselves for no apparent reason, you can understand why I was reluctant to do anything that will bring any kind of attention to them, or worse, further aggravate them.
Soon as I get myself situated, I’m going over to Express to demand a subsidy removal of the nipples on that blouse. Enough is enough.
pamilerin4me says
first!!!!!…hmmm nipples that act out on their own!!!! interesting
Vera Ezimora says
Very! Lol.
Pendo says
lol i resorted to wearing padded bras even tho am quite busty coz everytime i was in the refridgerated section of the supermarket my nipples would stand and i only noticed when i caught guys staring!
Vera Ezimora says
At least you have a clue when it will happen. Me, I never even know, and it happens every time for no particular reason.
Afrobabe says
lol…my nipples have their own mind as well…and I’d never buy that blouse…chai see eyes on my chest!!!
Vera Ezimora says
Yeah, I know. That’s why I didn’t bother buying it either. That would cause some very unwanted attention.
ImLuvinVera says
Laughsssssssss! Verastic!!! You are so brilliantly humorous!
Vera Ezimora says
Awwwwwww. Thank you. So sorry for the late response!
Ginger says
Vera, a friend of mine directed me to this your post with these words:
Found it extremely funny
and relaxing
and soothing
Wondrous post!
He is no longer my friend. #TeamSurviving onBoobsSubsidy
Vera Ezimora says
Hahahahahaha. So sorry for the late response. And lol at him no longer being your friend. Warn yourself oooo! You have no right to defriend such an awesome friend
Lanretall says
Vera wont just stop making me laugh….. i remember years ago when u displayed ur… undies here… now u got an unwanted nipple…
Vera Ezimora says
Lanre, Hahahaha. I remember the underwear. And that underwear was supposed to have a follow up post too. Hmmm. This might not be a bad time to do that post.
Adabeke says
My nipples has a mind of its own. I have to plan out which bra to wear, padded or not, depending on where I am going. It got so bad that my girlfriends bought me one of those nipple cover things for christmas. Even when i have on padded bra, it still wants to pop through the pads and I am not even busty…smh.
LOL @ nonsense tailor. I guess whoever designed this top wasn’t thinking that the whole purpose of a padded shirt is to hide the nipples…lol.
Vera Ezimora says
My dear, this nipple thing is crazy. So your friends bought you pasties. Did it work for you? I’ve never used them.
adabeke says
It is still in its original packaging somewhere. I probably will never use it because I feel like it would look weird with a shirt on plus it is only four in a pack. After it is finished, then what?
Vera Ezimora says
Still in it’s original packaging? Lol. I’ve also heard that you can use tissue too. Just fold it and place it over the nipple.