Have you ever had that kind of shit that vows it must tear your butt hole before it makes its grand exit? It’s very hard and very long. Please, get your mind out of the gutter. It’s so hard to come out that you have to hold both ankles just to give yourself the illusion that the shit is suddenly sliding out better. The difficulty with which it forces its way out makes your eyes water. You yelp out, moan, and groan — not for pleasure, but for pain.
It’s that kind of shit that while you’re at it, you beg God for forgiveness and promise swear that you will never, ever, ever disobey His word again, that you’ll go to church three times a week, that you’ll become a better worker in church, and that you’ll evangelize His goodness to the world.
It’s the kind of shit that has everybody in the house spitting and saying, “Hmm! Tufia kwa!” as they walk around. They ask, “What did you do in that toilet? It stinks!” It’s the kind of shit that stinks so bad that you don’t even bother using an air freshener. Why bother? When you get up from the commode and stir back at the object of your misery, you are filled with shock, confusion, excitement, and trepidation. A fleeting thought passes by: maybe you should take a picture and put it on Twitter. Those folks would love to see anything. You quickly dismiss the thought.
I call it the vampire shit. Have you ever had that kind of shit?
No?
Me neither. Just thought I’d ask.
It’s the kind of shit that has everybody in the house spitting and saying, “Hmm! Tufia kwa!” as they walk around. They ask, “What did you do in that toilet? It stinks!” It’s the kind of shit that stinks so bad that you don’t even bother using an air freshener. Why bother? When you get up from the commode and stir back at the object of your misery, you are filled with shock, confusion, excitement, and trepidation. A fleeting thought passes by: maybe you should take a picture and put it on Twitter. Those folks would love to see anything. You quickly dismiss the thought.
I call it the vampire shit. Have you ever had that kind of shit?
No?
Me neither. Just thought I’d ask.
the steamy one is the scariest, the one that comes out so hot that when it hits to cool water the reaction creates condensation on your bum…
Surprise Kakka is my fav.
1. GHOST KAKKA:
The kind where you feel the kakka come out, but there is no kakka in the toilet.
2. CLEAN KAKKA:
The kind where you kakka it out, see it in the toilet,but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
3. WET KAKKA:
The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels un-wiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won’t ruin them with stains.
4. SECOND WAVE KAKKA:
This happens when you’re done kakka-ing and you’ve
pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize
that you have to kakka some more.
5. POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD KAKKA:
The kind where you Strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
6. LINCOLN LOG KAKKA:
The kind of kakka that is so huge you’re afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet
brush.
7. GASSY KAKKA:
It’s so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.
8. DRINKER’S KAKKA:
The kind of kakka you have the morning after a long
night of drinking. It’s most noticeable trait is the skid
marks on the bottom of the toilet.
9. CORN KAKKA:
The kind of kakka where the corn look like raisins in
a muffin.
10. GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-KAKKA KAKKA:
The kind where you want to kakka but all you do is
sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
11. SPINAL TAP KAKKA:
That’s where it hurts so badly coming out, you’d swear
it was leaving you sideways.
12. WET CHEEKS KAKKA
(The Michael Schumacher Kakka):
The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get
splashed with water.
13. THE DANGLING KAKKA:
This kakka refuses to drop in the toilet even though
you are done kakka-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.
14. THE SURPRISE KAKKA:
You’re not even at the toilet because you are sure
you are about to fart, but *oops* — a kakka!
Now u know what ‘kakka’ is…..and what type your kakka is…hehehehehe!!! (Shit!)
http://chanelno5.wordpress.com/2008/11/08/kaka/