Every now and then, I like to blog about the key words that people search for on search engines, the keywords that ultimately lead them to Verastic.com It’d be incredibly unVerastic if I were to blog about the regular words. Who needs those? The absurd ones make my day any day. Enjoy.
1. Turai Yar’Adua
I’m not sure what bothers me most: the fact that the search for Turai leads people to my blog, or the fact that Turai Yar’Adua is the fourth leading search. I think it’s the latter. And this is all because of that flattering post about her
2. www.project@verastic.com
You think I should tell the searcher that www does not come before this or any e-mail address? Yeah, maybe later.
3. Oral sex in the bible.
Oh, honey, been there, done that — searched for it, that is. This may be hard to believe, but nowhere in the bible do the words oral sex appear. Go figure! But maybe my post on oral sex will help, no?
4. “I found out he’s married” “green card”
Now, can you ask him if he’d like to be a co-host on the Verastically Speakin’ Talk Radio Show? You (or he) can read about the talk show, and the show in question is number 11.
5. Angelina Jolie stay away from my man
*Gasp* Oh, my goodness!!! Vanessa Pardis, is this you? You found my blog! How is Johnny Depp? Wait, did you read the post I put up about you two three?
6. Ask boyfriend for facebook password to prove trust.
Sweetheart, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but passwords and trust are almost mutually exclusive. Besides, he could be like me. I have several e-mail accounts — which, of course, only implies that I love e-mails J
7. Aso Rock boyfriend of Turia Yar’Adua
Turai has a boyfriend at Aso Rock?! I knew it! Now, it’s all starting to make sense.
8. Boyfriend used to date my friend.
9. Boyfriend won’t give me his Facebook password.
10. Breasts that reach for the sky.
Only a man would search for this.
11. Does Tonto Dike use Makari?
Seriously???
12. Get perkier breasts
13. How to rededicate my life to Christ.
More often than not, people start with a bible-believing church.
14. I love my fat wife
Good for you!!
15. I want a fatter wife
Please refer to number 14 above.
16. If your boyfriend doesn’t call you in a day and doesn’t send a text, does he love you?
Heck, if I know!
17. My friend is technically engaged
You’re technically a bridesmaid.
18. My push up bra will get my man
What kind of push up bra is that, and where can I get one?
19. Sniff menstruation pads
Before or after they’ve been menstruated on?
20. Verastic Nigerian blogger.
Finally! Someone looks for me JJJ
P.S. The show goes live in less than 10 hours (at 10am U.S EST and 3pm Nigerian time). I’ll be co-hosting with Diamond, NaijaBloke, and Kola [Baroka] Tubosun, and we’ll be talking about how to, if you will, tell your friend that his/her spouse-to-be is a monster. Listen here. Call in: 1.646.929.1905 <<>> Text your response(s): 1.443.934.9039 <<>> E-mail your response(s): radio@verastic.com
P.P.S. The Verastic Facebook Fan Page is still lonely. Join, please?
P.P.P.S. Go vote for today’s show!
P.P.P.P.S. If you have already voted for today’s show, vote for next week’s show.
One of the benefits of sleeping at 12.58am is that I get to be the first to spill…
Breasts that reach the sky? LOL. Goodnight missy! See you tmr…I'll be on, but no chatting for me this time since I'll be studying simultaneously…okay, so maybe I'll chip in a little bit…okay, maybe a little bit more…GOSH, show's tempting me. #OKthanksbye
LMHO!!!!
Oh, have mercy Lord! the things people search for on google!
What's with sniffing menstruation pads? Is it to get high or something? And breasts reaching for teh sky??? Lol!
yay!! second!!! sniffing pads though?? I don't even wanna know..Note to self- I need to get with twitter mehn, so I can sign off like Jayce #OKthanksbye.
uhm ok sniffing pads? i thought every girl did that………i hate my period absolutely! live in denial through it and avoid seeing "it" as much as possible but ………….with every pad change i sniff the pad! my friend caught me doing it one day lol turns out she does it too! we had a good laugh …………theres something so earthy and alluring about the smell….do i hear eeeew? lol whateva really thought all girls did it! *confused and wondering whether to be embarrassed or not*)
Breasts that reach the sky? Oh my days…
Will be tuning in, can't wait.
LOL!!!
love the "you are technically a bridesmaid" response…go Vera! lol
Had a nice laugh on the searches and congrats too!I'm really happy for you.. Would you like to have a banner of WE ARE JOS on your site?We'd be so honored.If yes, please visit http://helpnigeria.blogspot.com
Thank you so very much.
interesting choice of post. i enjoyed it. keep it up, Vera.
You are just something else!!!And dang,were all these people waiting up just to post a reply b4 me!!!lol!Heyy,when/Do do air in Nigeria?
breasts that reach the sky?!?!
VERA!!!!
nice new template, I see you have also changed your about me section, nice…What is a makari?!