… Is that you can plummet to your death. Take for instance, this Chinese couple in the City of Wuhan. They were having sex on the window when it gave way and they plummeted to their death. Naked and everything. No information on whether they were still attached at the hip when the fall happened. May their souls rest in perfect peace.
See, there are so many places and positions to have sex in, so I can understand why people want to continue getting more creative. It’s like the more positions and places we discover, the more positions and venues we want. But my people, I love you, and I’d like for you to keep reading my blog. So please don’t plummet to your death, especially while having sex. In order to avoid this, I’m going to list a few safe venues for sex
1. The bed
2. The couch
3. The floor.
END OF DISCUSSION.
Anything outside this list is dangerous, like any of the following:
1. On the stove (you can get burnt)
2. On the freezer (you can freeze)
3. In a moving car (do I really need to explain this?)
4. On a tree (You can fall off and/or be bitten by a snake)
5. Hanging from a chandelier (you can get shocked and/or plummet to your death)
6. In the bath tub (you can slip)
7. On the window (did you read the first paragraph of this post?)
8. In church (God can strike you down)
9. On the roof (please see number 7 of this post)
10. On your office table (the legs can break)
11. On the balcony (please see number 7 again)
Whatever location you may be thinking of, if is it not the bed, couch, or floor, then don’t do it. And err, once again, RIP to the couple above.
P.S. This takes “dying inside a woman” to a whole other level
P.S. I don’t have the actual picture of the couple because the site that published the story has a copyright thingy on the picture that says I have to ask for permission first. But you can click HERE to see it.
Berry Dakara says
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I must and I WILL do it on the balcony! With a rail for protection, of course.
You didn’t add 11 (because I’ve taken the liberty to rule the previous 11 null and void). In the pool/river/stream/ocean (you can drown)
Vera Ezimora says
Berry, I have warned you oh! Lol. And yes, you’re totally right. You can drown in whatever body of water it is. Lol.
CyRil says
I’m trying to understand how you’d freeze on the freezer tho
Vera Ezimora says
Hahaha. Look Cyril, don’t ask me. Just take my word for it! Plus, err, I couldn’t come up with anything else. 😉