Not his fingernails, but you get the idea
I will not boast of having heard it all. After all, it was just the other day that I learned of salad tossing, but that’s a totally different story. So, there I was, having a mini Girls’ Night Out with a bunch of girls, and as usual, the major topic of discussion was men. What else is there to talk about anyway?
Chika, a semi-new friend of ours randomly mentioned Nnamdi, a guy who likes her, but whom, unfortunately, she cannot date. “He’s too short,” she told us. Well, nothing new about that. A lot of women prefer men who are about six feet tall (or at least visibly taller than them). Of course, it takes having a taste of both worlds (tall and short) to realize that there’s something in between — and it has nothing to do with the height.
Chika’s position did not surprise us. My list does, after all, state that I want someone who is “visibly taller than me.” What did stun me however was that Chika’s biggest problem was not the height of Nnamdi’s body, but rather the length of his finger nails. Yes, yes, Nnamdi is short, and yes, she does have a problem with his height, but she is more concerned about the length of his finger nails.
It turns out that a man’s finger nails are directly proportional to the length of his member. Nnamdi’s finger nails aren’t short because he cut them, or because he has stopped them from growing, but rather because he has one of those nails that even when cut short, they are still short – compared to other people’s short nails.
Try as I might, I could not find a picture of short nails. I’m sure it has a name. These doctors and scientists always have a way of making everything sound worse. A boil, for example, is called a furuncle. I prefer to just call it a boil. I feel a lot better that way. But on the issue of Chika and Nnamdi, I will now go ahead and commence Operation-Test-The-Nails/Member-Theory on every man. Starting from today – especially today, I will study every man’s finger nails, and soon and very soon, the truth will be told!
What say you?
lol u right CaramelD. … Vera this is hilarious. I most say, I actually heard of that too before so now i guess i would start looking.
Seriously now, Vera… so if u want to test out your theory and u checkout my fingernail length, what next? U gonna strip me down to confirm? Or better yet, jump into bed with me?
(P.S: they're suitably long. lol)
I have no words…
Actually I do.
Please inform Chika that unless she has amassed evidence to support this theory of hers, she should not be discounting men because of fingernail length. Where did she hear that anyway?
Na wah for people oh! LOL
smh
Verastic……
Like CaramelID said, what will I not hear on Vera's blog?
I think your friend is just being silly. What a flimsy reason for discounting a human being as a partner.
have heard about the toenail..though i must say, i've never taken any particular notice of the co-relation..
hearing about fingernail fr the first time, as with such things, the problem remains how to confirm?
Mba. That theory is total rubbish. I can tell you from experience. *wink*
Vera Vera Vera
ya semi new friend…….i tire
nails vs phallus size???
*shaking my head*
I am gobsmacked. Really.
Vera Vera….You keep us coming back for more with your wit…
But seriously, I've not heard this before o…maybe i need to start paying attention.
Have you got any male volunteers yet?
What I've heard is finger length, not finger nail length o!
In any case, you go ahead and do the check. Please be sure to publish the results as soon as they are available.
is she kidding me??
wat??/
The fallacy continues. It's like saying tall/huge girl will always have huge bobbi. And a girl with huge bobbi will always guarantee good caning. No, size isn't always the issue, there are so many other factors to consider.
lawd a mercy!!!!
Lol… you know when you have too many men knocking on your door, and you're looking for an excuse to eliminate some of them from your list? That's exactly what this is. WTH.
my people perish for lack of knowledge…
thus says the Lord
Funny as hell. *Dead*
Lol that's very interesting..
smh, what has my eye not seen or read on this your blog. so now the size of funfer nail is the size of a man's kini.
*thinking*
looool!
Now Vera,you want to start a revolution where lepers will no longer have date,what will you say about a leper that has no fingers,does it mean he has no …..that thing?.Next time a girl check my finger,I'll know,this is verastic revolution.
thats total bullshit. asians have the longest nails but they have the tiniest dicks
This lady is the freaken funniest..
Had me starting to worry about my 1 month old boyfriend.. He has little to no fingernails at all !!