The only time I used to really follow Steve Harvey was when he had that show, The Steve Harvey Show in which he played the character of Steve Hightower and was a teacher and Vice Principal in Booker T. Washington High School and was madly in love with Regina. Don’t remember if Regina was a teacher or the Principal, or both. Since then, I’ve know what he’s been up to, but I’ve not made any conscious effort to find out. His day time talk show is about to start its third season, which is great because it’s not easy getting and keeping a show on television.
Steve Harvey
Anyway, Steve Harvey was being interviewed by I-don’t-remember-who and he was asked if men can change. He gave what I considered to be a profound answer. Maybe not to you, but it was profound to me. He said (and I’m paraphrasing),
Every man can change. Every man will change. But a man will only change for the right woman.
As I processed what he said, I thought to myself that this makes perfect sense! How many times have I met women who would describe their exes as complete ass holes, but when I meet the wives of said exes, the story is totally different. The wives say that their husbands are gods among men. For example: I know it’s not one of my business, but I wish that Brad and Angelina had met differently (or started dating differently). I wish Brad had divorced Jennifer Aniston before moving on with Angelina. That said, I’m sure that Angelina and Jennifer would have totally different descriptions of their time with Brad (and this is taking the whole cheating thing aside). I mean, even without the cheating, I’m sure Jennifer experienced a different Brad than the one that Angelina is experiencing.
My philosophy on men changing has always been that a man will change when he wants to change, and he won’t do it for anyone but himself. But Steve Harvey’s explanation of men changing is a better explanation than mine. I’m thinking about all the former bad guys I know and how they changed when they met their women. They didn’t change for every woman; they just changed for that one woman.
So I have three questions I’d like to get your thoughts on:
1. For the men who are straight up assholes to their women, is that because they are with the wrong women? Or is that because they are just assholes who will never change, regardless of the quality of women they are blessed to be with?
2. For the women who have assholes as men (you know yourselves), why is your man an asshole?
3. For the men reading this blog, how right or wrong is Steve Harvey in his assessment?
P.S. Igwe says Steve Harvey is right on the money (and Igwe has always said that a man will change for the right woman).
