Why I Married A Nigerian Man | By Fiona Keene

I am British by upbringing and Ugandan by birth. I get people all the time telling me that I am brave for having dropped everything as I knew from Jand and moving to Nigeria. Some people even thought they could have seen me with a white man or even a Ugandan man, but a Nigerian one? Definitely not.

Growing up I used to go help my mumsi in the salon after school. There was always plenty gist about Nigerian men in particular, how corrupt they are. The discussion was always among other Nigerian university students themselves; they would discuss how so and so’s son is doing yahoo yahoo (internet fraud). In some cases I would see the negative side of some Nigerian men with my own eyes – Nigerian young men marrying fat white girls that you could not place them with on a normal day – all for papers (visas). And of course the story most times turned out that they had a wife back home, or they would divorce them after getting what they want. Thank goodness the Western government has made the process more complicated, so men can think twice before going to play with someone’s daughters life.

So, back to why I married a Nigerian man. In my university days, (and even now), it was always known that Nigerian men went for Ugandan and Zimbabwean girls because they were easy to get into bed. I could not really argue this matter because I saw it happen constantly, and the girls would just get pregnant and have children for them. So, as an educated and exposed young woman, I always thought it best to stay away from Nigerian men because they would just sleep with me, get me pregnant, and happily pay child support. When I started dating my husband while in university, I had to admit to myself that na mumu love carry me come here today o!

I knew his initial intentions were not pure. but for some reason, the washing no let me waka. As we dated, however, we noticed we were similar in many ways. I have to admit that it was the way he treated me like a lady that caught my attention.  In fact, the guy don blow my mind. First of all, he worshiped the ground I walked on, and spoiled me with gifts like phones, perfumes, and watches. He did not know how to buy flowers at that time sha, but I guess that would have been a shocker for a typical Warri man.

In the Western culture, most monetary responsibilities tend to be shared between the couple, and this was a culture I had gotten used to. Whilst on dates, especially with White men, they would confidently bring out their share of the money. When I met my Mr. Nigeria – don’t you love his name? – this culture seemed so bizarre to him. He would happily pay for everything. I could see a look of pride when he did so as well. I so loved this! I did not know they made them like that.  It was not about the money, but the thought was everything. I also noticed that he showed a lot of respect to his parents and would never dream of talking back to them. He respected his elders even when the age difference was close to none. He understood the role of being a man in a relationship by taking care of all major responsibilities. It was at this time that I managed to save tremendously.

Our only shortcoming was that he was a big flirt. No surprises there.  Nigerian men are rarely afraid of rejection, so they tend to be forward. I have witnessed this several times. Telling a Nigerian man that you are engaged, married, or pregnant is never enough reason to discourage them. They are go-getters!  Anyway, back to my Mr. Nigeria; his good outweighed the bad (flirtatious nature), and when he was ready to settle down, his level of commitment skyrocketed to an extent that even scared me a little.

One thing was evident, however, and that was that he had a great upbringing. I can confidently attribute his personality to this — and to his culture, too.  When we decided to get married, we faced a lot of adversity from our family and friends, but in retrospect, I realize now that it was all God’s plan for us.

I am not advising that you, too, should follow my footsteps, and I am definitely not encouraging other nations to come and take “our” Nigerian men (wink), but what I am saying is that other African countries should learn a thing or two about the Nigerian culture.  Let us not only focus on the corruption stigma, but also on the good things about Nigeria and Nigerians.

Nigeria is a God-fearing country, and the people are extremely driven and lovely. The men provide for their wives, and the women tend to take on the role of being virtuous women as they run their home while working to save for the future. I would like to thank Mr. Nigeria’s mummy for raising such a lovely man in preparation for me.

This is why I  married a Nigerian man.

BIO: I was born in Uganda, grew up in the UK. I am an entrepreneur, married, and I am expecting my second bundle of joy.

You can connect with me on Instagram, Facebook, and on my blog, Fiona Uncensored.