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August 24, 2020

Remember That Time I Said I May Never Remarry?

Well, my friends and family are still not taking me seriously. They think that me saying I may never remarry it just a phase. And frankly, I do not blame them one hundred percent because I have slipped and caught myself making statements like, 'When I get married,' or 'I want my traditional wedding to be ...." or 'When my husband and I ..." So, I guess it's not completely their fault for not taking me seriously. Also, with the rate at which I keep sending them pictures of beautiful black men, Read More

August 3, 2020

July 27, 2020

Can Women Be Divorced And Happy?

Can women actually be divorced and happy? For some reason, being divorced and happy, especially for a woman, seems like it's mutually exclusive. I will not make the claim that all women are divorced and happy, but I can confidently say that any woman who gets divorced for the right reasons can be - and most likely is - divorced and happy. Our culture abhors divorce. Our culture also abhors a free-thinking, independent woman because she is seen as rebellious and unsubmissive. You already know my Read More

July 23, 2020

How To Use Your Talents For God

How does one use their talents for God? Do you know? I have personally struggled with this one since I became aware of it. I was born and raised a Christian, so for me, the bible has answers to everything. Honestly, sometimes, the bible leaves me with more questions than answers and I don't know if it's because I'm being too logical or if my faith is even smaller than a mustard seed. Still, I have always pondered: how do you use tour talents for God? What is Talent anyway? The dictionary Read More

July 20, 2020

6 Questions I Stopped Asking After My Marriage Ended

It probably goes without saying that after my marriage ended, my views evolved or completely changed on a lot of things. On last week's episode of the I Am African Podcast, I asked my guest, Ruth Marimo, how anyone could cope with not being included or invited after they make a drastic change in their lives. She told me that while one will lose some loved ones, that one will also gain new, relevant people. She proceeded to ask me if I had met more divorced people or people with marital Read More

July 13, 2020

Emotional Resilience: How To Deal With Not Being Included

"Vera, you're so strong!" I've practically heard this for as long as I can remember. I heard it most when I left my marriage. People congratulated me for being so strong, for having the audacity to walk out of a marriage that was trampling me and robbing me of my peace. I did not understand why I was being congratulated. Should one not always leave a situation that is bad for them? But that's by the way. To be strong, one has to be emotionally resilient. Some people are strong because Read More

July 9, 2020

Things You Should Say During Great Sex

So, the other day, I was scrolling through Facebook when I came across a post in a Facebook group that caught my attention. It was a lighthearted, funny post by a woman asking us (fellow women) the crazy things we had uttered out of our mouths during great sex. So, of course, I proceeded to read, and I was consequently entertained, humored, and eventually, distraught. I'll explain. The other day on the podcast, I mentioned simple things that I have never done but would like to do. Well, a few of Read More

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