This question isn’t actually for only single people. It’s for everyone who is single right now, or used to be single at some point. Meaning, it’s for EVERYONE. So, as you read this, please kindly respond. It’s a question from a fellow reader of Verastic, and it’s posted below:
“Can you please put up a post asking your readers what their regular day is like. I’m a single female, I live alone (no Igwe). I go to work, get back, watch TV and wonder what other people are doing with their time. Help me out abeg.”
Continue to read my response:
First of all, I’m laughing out loud at the “no Igwe” comment. That said, I don’t know if I am in the best position to respond to this because I have never lived alone. Still, I’ll do my best. BI (before Igwe, tehehe), I lived with mom. Though there were times I was home alone for days, the fact is that at some point, mom always came back home. But a typical day for me involved school and/or work, coming home to work on my assignments – if I had any – and then, focusing the rest of my time on my blog.
In between, I talked to friends on the phone a lot. By the time I start a conversation with Funmie, we might go on for hours, literally. I was never much of a TV person, but when I could, I hung out with friends. There were times that I even hung out alone. I’d go to restaurants, Barnes and Noble, movies, etc — by myself.
I can’t say that I was ever really bored or wanting for something to do, as somehow, I always had something to do. Blogging and blog-patrolling alone could take all day. My disclaimer here is that I am also an only child, so being by myself – even when I was doing nothing – was never too much work. I relished my solitude.
My advice for you – though it might sound like a cliché – is get a hobby. Maybe a Zumba class. Cooking. Movies. Blogging. Reading. Or if you have good friends, meet up! Discover new places together. When in doubt, take a nap. Everything becomes better after a nap.
Now, over to everyone. Please tell her what to do.
Image source: Essence
My day… Hmmmm, I work, like 3jobs, 2 for people, 3rd for myself, so never a dull moment, sleep is a luxury for me, so every free time I get to spend with friends and family is intense, I also love my solitude, and like Vera, blogging seems to take up my time 🙂 and I love it so much to complain, I search out inspiring stories and writers, I get inspired, I share and write mine, I meet all sorts of interesting people via social media, not necessarily in the flesh, and I encourage and build and empower them to be better and few do same(those I treasure) one of my jobs happens to be a relaxation place, lots of interesting people get to pass through, and I get to learn a lot, I’ve also taking to photography, and photo editing, there is so much to do dear, lots of self help books for you to learn more about any of your passions, life is too short to be bored, and don’t look for someone to cure that, learn to enjoy your company and you would never run dry, cus more people would be drawn to you, I’m currently working on a note regarding something on boredom, perhaps when through would shout out to verastic on your behalf or feel free to stop by on your own, lots of inspiring reads, I’m on cknaija.Wordpress.com for now.
So I’m with Vera on you getting a hobby, most importantly, enjoy being single before you miss it 😉
CK, I toooootslly agree on enjoying being single while she still can. Cause when a husband and/or baby comes along, her time will no longer be fully hers. Finding a hobby would definitely be my number fix.
Like Vera, as an only Mama’s child, I was fine being alone. I wasn’t such a TV or movie person. I enjoyed being alone to think and work on future plans. My typical day revolved around work, school, blog and occasional conversations with friends.
I will also suggest taking fun classes like Zumba, Pilates or blogging.
xoxo
Stella
Copy cat. Because I was an only child, you too decided to be an only cold too, abi! Mind yourself oh!
lol @BI (before igwe) just like Vera i too was brought up alone even though i am not an only child long story so i am pretty much used to my own company. I have no problems hanging out alone i can go to the mall and spend hours by myself attend events by myself, i am a fan of museums so i visit those too etc but i still hang out with my friends when they are available. First of all do you have friends with similar interests you guys can have a weekly meet up either for a meal, movie, drinks or whatever tickles your fancy. f you are a church girl you can join groups like bible study and meet people that you can do fun stuff with when you are not working. Like has been suggested take a class baking, flower arrangement etc to keep you busy. I tend to read a lot when i am alone both online reading and hardcover books those keep my mind occupied for hours. There are also plenty of free online classes you can take http://www.coursera.org for one or learn a new language via youtube i am currently learning french. I love to cook as well and i do that a lot when i am bored i will look up new recipes online (i watch a lot of YT cooking videos BTW) and make something new. Have a dinner party once in a while invite a few close friends maybe five and ask them to bring along someone new (not their significant other) that way you get to widen your circle of friends. Check with your local library/newspaper they usually have a listing of events happening in your area that you can attend (most are usually free or charge very little) and maybe even make new friends at. I hope that helps.
Pendo, I have never heard of that website. I’m gonna check it out too. I am not bored, and I can’t even say that I have much time to take up something new, but let’s see what u find there. Thanks for responding. Hope this really helps the reader.
The only thing I got from this post is : Vera lives with Igwe!
LOL!
Bumight you carried last o she has been codedly telling us for the last few months lol
Lol at codedly telling us. Pendo!
SMH.
That’s the only thing you wanted to get. And technically, I did not even say that I live with him.
Vera lives with Igwe!!!
I’m a singleton meself. A natural loner so living alone has always been comfy. I tend to run off to be alone when I have people in space (No matter how short their stay is)
I watch TV, I cook, I write…or sometimes pretend to, I make plans, I sew, There’s so much to do (Sans an “Igwe” lol)
Take up a hobby girlfriend.
Good for your mind.
Singleton. That is someone’s last name oh. I, too, tend to run away when there are people around. Like I enjoy them for the first few days, but after that, I’m good. I’m not the type of person who invites people over for brunch. Lol. Nope.
Apart from work, which usually takes up most of the weekday anyway, there is rarely anything going on during the week. I know people who have taken up cooking classes, community clubs, volunteering, etc to fill up weekends.
Personally, after going through Monday to Friday, I consider Saturday my God given right as a day to do NOTHING. This basically means Sunday is the one day when I consider myself “bored” nowadays. If I do get an “itch” to do something its usually sightseeing since I am STILL discovering the city I live in, or hanging out with one of everyone’s favorite anonymous boyfriends.
I just realized my week sounds like a 50 year old post children. Maybe I should do more? Lol
Exsctly. The week goes by so fast that I usually don’t even wanna add more activities, unless I have to. And for me, Saturday feels like a week day, too becaue I have to do the show. And I start prepping for that hours before it goes live. Sunday is my only day “off” and I am not even technically off because church starts at 11 (but let me not lie; I usually get there around 12:30).
If Vera and Igwe are living together, that must mean that they are heading to the alter soon! How cool is that? Haha!
Lol. I don’t even know how to respond to this. I’ll let it mellow, it will be addressed in the future. Lol.
By the time i get on the phone with Vera, the day is GONE.
funny thing, i don’t even have enough time for myself.. talk less of asking for what to do with it.
i never get enough sleep… or i always want more sleep. I am always rushing somewhere or cooking or running errands or at work or……………
Lesson learnt : I need to set out time for myself.
my dear lady, enjoy this time while it lasts…. if u really want more to do sha – hang out with ur coworkers, join a church workforce, dress up and just go too places u normally would go anyway.
P.S…. you will need to fill this void prior to getting an “Igwe,” else you become a dependant/nagging “lo-lo.” You will be clingy and always depend on the dude to keep you company and that my dear is NOT reality.
Bia, Funmie. Can you use other names apart from Igwe and Lolo to drive your point home? Lol. And lol at your day is gone by the time you get on the phone with Vera. I will take it as a compliment. It’s not my fault that you love talking to me. Speaking of you cooking, when are we coming over again?
Others have said it all. Learn to love your company, find new hobbies, make new friends. You can also take the bus or walk around new parts of the city you live in.
Ooooo. Myne, I did not think of the bus one. Good thinking!
As a single babe, in this *cuffing season, I agree with all the above. However, it’s also important to remember what/who you already have. Some mentioned finding new friends, I suggest also reestablishing your relationships with present ones. Is there a friend you’ve been meaning to “catch up” with, but simply haven’t found the time? What of that your old girlfriend that used to come over every Sunday during uni, when last did you gist with her? Etc. We often forget about the people in our life, when searching elsewhere.
Another great source of companionship is from family! I read an interesting tweet the other day that basically said, this generation is all about “prayer and family, yet no one remembers to say grace and call their parents” anymore. In your free time, try calling your parents, if you can, just to check on them and say hi. It’s guaranteed to make their day! Have younger/older siblings? They miss us more than we think, lol.
As cliche as this may sound, use this period in life to learn more about yourself. Some pick up the habit of learning their Bible more, others go out to wine-tastings, whatever suits you. In terms of hobbies, what do you *really enjoy doing? Might be the time to try something out of character too: join a pole dancing class, learn to dancehall -whine pon di ting, cook Indian food, go to the movies -alone, etc. Personally, I love to “wakabout,” so after classes sometimes I drive around and find different areas to explore in this new city.
If you find yourself in one of these “networking”events, albeit through church, school or wherever, remember the Bible passage that says we must “show ourselves friendly”. Don’t be scurred to meet people in social places, it never hurts to at least try. You know?
…I only meant to type a sentence or two lol. *le sigh
Yeah. Thanks for the “sentence” lol. So at the time I read this comment (about an hour ago), I had so much to reply. But then, I walked away from my iPad to attend to some things, and now that I am back, I don’t remember what I was going to say. But thank you. Lol.
Oh, and groupon.com and livingsocial.com are greattt sources for finding things to do/buy *cheaply in your area. Try it!
Toooootally agree with the Living Social and GroupOn thing. Just this Saturday, Igwe and I went speedboat riding, not because we cared so much for it, but because we found it in Living Social at a really discounted rate.
cant you see they went ring shopping? if you havent read it, read it here http://verastic.com/vl/so-igwe-and-i-went-ring-shopping.html lol
Lol! Ehm. Thank you for the referral. Tehehehe.
Vera thanks for putting up the post. I actually do spend a lot of time blog reading, reading checked out books from the library etc. I used to enjoy my solitude a lot but then I started getting this nagging “other people are doing great things tonight, but you sit here reading” feeling.
Thanks y’all for the suggestions.
Lol at everyone doing great things tonight feeling. Well, as you can see, they are just reading too. Lol. Thanks for sending it in.
This is the life of young professionals in America. Go to work, catch some tv/go to games,read, eat, and sleep. I am a single guy,,,,,,,,,,,,,,looking. Is that you in that stunning picture attached to this post?
LOL. Ehm, Bami, I don’t know if you’re asking if the picture is me, or if the picture is the Verastic reader, but either way, the answer is no. My picture isn’t on this blog yet; I’m working on it. The picture is a random person. And you’re right; a lot of young professionals do live this way. There isn’t much else to do. By the time you come home from work, you’re beat.
I hope you find someone soon 😉
I was asking if that was the picture of your reader. Vera, I know that’s not you in the picture. Not that I know you but I have seen your picture here on your blog. My bad.
Not a problem, Bami. I just wasn’t sure who you were inquiring about. That’s not her anyway; just a random picture. Thanks for reading 😀
I love all the suggestions!
Me too 🙂
I like Funmie’s lolo and Igwe examples lmao
Look at your mouth. That is the on you will like. Don’t just lemme catch you there oh.
Find your passion, turn it into a business and blog about it. And take it seriously. That’ll suck up half your day. lol
I tooooootally agree. As a blogger, I can definitely stamp it. Oh, yeah. It’ll take up your entire day. I’ve been on my computer all day. I mean alllllll day.
My dear singleton
If you are African and are above 25yrs go home and buy LAND.
they range from £800 per plot to £1800 these are the ones i feel You can afford.
Do not fear just tune your mind to do it and you will complete the project.
If you have parents back home all the better do not give the project to friends or relatives.
Only do the building when you are there.
Even if it takes you 5yrs completion is assured.
Better than buying Manolo Blahnic.
Nice, oh, my God, you have been cracking up like an idiot here. It’s almost midnight, and I’m laughing my head off. She should go and buy land to control the boredom? LOL! On that note, I do agree with you that investing in a piece of land is far better – and obviously has an intrinsic value – than a pair of shoes.
Dear Singleton
Enhe something took me away o.
So how this becomes a hobby is that u will eventually find yourself researching about architectural designs, landscaping, interiors ets.
Attend fairs and ask questions, collect leaflets.
Consider even buying and collecting items such as house fixtures which u get on the cheap at end of season sale.
Dream and keep dreaming.
Whilst this is occupying your mind longterm take up other smaller hobbies as suggested above by others.
I DARE YOU!!
Oh, I see. Now it all makes sense. You know, Nice, you actually are quite business savvy. I don’t own a piece of land in Nigeria, and all of a sudden, I, too, am thinking thoughts. Hmmmmmm.
Am a new reader on this blog and av already fallen in love with Igwe and Vera
Yay!!!! Thank you, Chizzie!! We have fallen in love with you, too.