As I type this, I am literally falling asleep. But I just wanna update y’ll on my weekend – nothing spectacular though
SATURDAY
Yesterday, my aunt said she was coming to my house for me to do her hair, and she said she was coming with her four yr old son. Next thing I knew, she was there with her son, her other sister, and her mother. (By the way, my aunt and her sister are both mom’s younger sisters and their mom – my grandma is mom’s mom, of course). Before they came, I had spent all morning cleaning my house down; it was sparkling clean! Soon as I saw my aunt and her batallion, I just knew my house would never be the same.
When my lil cousin started eating the pizza they came with, and I saw the tomato on the couch, I was about to lose my mind! I was about to have a mental heart attack! I kept on picking crumbs of food everywhere. Shit, I was going crazy on the inside.
The day turned out to be not so bad; we watched Naija movies and laughed our hearts out. But that didn’t change the fact that I had a whole lotta cleaning to do though. I had to vacuum the house again! By the way, the first thing my cousin did to mess up the house was pee on the toilet seat. Wat rubbish! I had just wiped it down with pine sol. It was as fresh as pine sol itself. And then he pee’d on it. You shoulda heard me giving him a piece of my mind. He knew not to pee on the toilet seat. Well, next time he comes, I’m sure he’ll remember.
SUNDAY
Mom and I drove to grandma’s house (I was driving) and we fought all the way. She doesn’t like the way I drive, and I don’t like the way she drives – so go figure. Church was supposed to start at 12pm and we called grandma @ 9am to let her know we were coming. When we got to grandma’s house, it was almost 11am, and grandma had just gotten outta the shower. By the time she was ready to go, it was 11:15am. As we were about to leave the house, she decided she wanted to change because the outfit she was wearing was her “christmas outfit” (called so because it’s her newest lace from my mom).
While mom and I sat in the living room (with mom swelling up like a balloon), a commercial on TV bout some lil recorder thingy came on. You use it for voice memos….and it costs $19.99.
I thought it was pretty stupid, so I said, “Yeah right! What stupid person would order that?“
Then I turned around and saw my mom scribbling the number down
……..Well, there goes my answer! Who knew it’d be so close to home?
Needless to say, she and I immediately burst out laughing.
After church, we went to see this Igbo family that just had their first baby (a girl named Chioma) five weeks ago. The father’s nose was outstanding! It was that kinda nose you wouldn’t wanna be stuck in an elevator with because it would suck up allll the oxygen! His nose was mighty….errrr…. wat’s da word — mighty???
And guess what? His daughter has the nose too! Well, one thing is for sure—she won’t ever be out of breath! I just hope she doesn’t get a hold of anyone’s ventilator. But she IS beautiful though. We (including the wife/mother) were all cracking jokes on the father and his daughter. The mom said as soon as she got to hold her baby (after giving birth to her), the first thing she looked @ was her nose, and as soon as she saw the father’s nose on the daughter, she was like… “Hey, this gal! What did I tell you? I told you not to have his nose!” Well, maybe the womb is soundproof???
….That’s it for saturday & sunday
EXTRAZ
I changed my template…as y’ll have noticed. I did it all by myself…YAY! However, AZUKA helped me with some stuff too. Thanks a lot, Azuka. You’re da best! He’s my blog’s errr gynaecologist.
My last post about my mom reminded me of the time I blogged about my embarrassing moment. Click HERE to read it
All done…… See y’ll tomorrow!
Did your Mummy hear you? If she did, she shoulda slapped your face!!!! LOL!!!
Enjoy your week 🙂
These comments about your mom sef. I hope she doesn’t read your blog?
Are you sure yo shouldn’t be a standup comedian?
Blog gynae… what the… ??? Never examined the internals of your blog before…
LOL at your embarrasing story!!! This girl you are tooooooo funny!! But how far now? At least someone should have carried you back to your seat, laid you down and let you continue sleeping!
I hope you learnt your lesson, though. next time you want to sleep in church just kneel down and pretend you’re praying like the rest of us do. lol….
So Vera, I read your comment on Azuka’s site about nigerianbloggers.com and thought I’d check it out… and then I saw I that my blog is there! When I did it, I don’t know oh… That is too weird.
My Suggestion: CLICK THIS
To check out how it looks with all the blogs, click HERE
Vera u don craze finish. Kai! Never a dull moment in that ur house. Ur momsy shoulda given u a hot slap.
London Buki, thank you ehn. I see how much you care about me. Yes, she heard me, but she knew I wasn’t talking about her. I mean, I didn’t even know she was about to order it. Thanks for the links. I’m about to check them out right now.
Azuka: You haven’t examined it YET. Some day, you’ll find reason to err poke around in her. Stand up comedian? Mm, you obviously haven’t heard me speaking in public. I start stammering and all sort.
Beautifully Human: the good thing is that you’re admitting the truth about your prayer(s) in church, but for you to suggest such a despicable thing for me 2 do is an absolute outrage! I shall not be involved in such… LOL. But yes oh, you better believe I have since learnt not to fake the holy ghost.
Bijouxoxo: I see how you and London Buki are wishing me bad ehn?? No problem. That hot slap y’ll want me 2 have will go to two of you…on both cheeks o!
lmao.. too too funny @ u sleepin after recieving ur ‘annointment’. ur mom is just too funny.. i can see where u get it from…
Hmm nice post eh!
Wait oh! se na the same “VERA” for MD wey I dey think be this? “ezimora”? NS aka NaijaSpice?
I’m amazed at ur grandmma- out of the shower at almost 11am, ready to go by 11.15. She try oh!! It takes me at least 45mins to have my bath and get dressed and thats only if I had already choosen what I was going to wear before going to the bathroom. And I’m not even a girly girl!!
LOL at azuka being ur blog gynaecologist – azuka ur titles plenty. (smile)
vera wait till i meet ur mum and give her a link to ur blog.
Overwhelmed, yes oh, indeed the woman is a character. Too much of a character sef.
Naijadude – ah, where do I know you from? Abi should I say, are you a member of TN too?
Calabar Gal:I made a mistake. It wasn’t eleven yet when she got into the shower. But I know it was 11:15 when she gat out. Yes indeed, I spend a lotta time in the bathroom too.
Chief: I know you wouldn’t dare! Ah ah, fear no dey catch you?
Yes Oh! I used to be a faithful member of TN..
Abegi Madam Nurse, put 2 and 2 together and make dem be 4, How many Canadian members una get, and live in Lethbridge sef! Even feature for the TN member home page at one point!
Damn did I say my blog is anonymous! hahah
Oh my gosh!!! So na u ehn??
I thought it might be you cause you’re the only Canadian I could think of on TN. Oh wow! Small world sha.
@ a point, I started thinking it might be this other Canadian guy I know (though he’s not on TN, he knows of it). But then that guy is way too aggressive and from the things you’ve written, I figured it couldn’t be you.
Hmmmmmmmmm. So much for being anonymous huh? LOL
Thought about making my blog anonymous @ first, but then I realized it was too much of a hassle. But it’s all good sha.
I was lookin @ ur picture ealier and I kept looking @ it over and over tryna figure u out, but I guess I kinda needed a face. I was wishin I could look inside the pc to see your face.
Well, one thing is for sure. I gotta add you to my favorite blogs, so I can read your stuff more often.
Crush on me?? Oh, boy, you make me blush! We need to talk. Email me your number; I’ll call ya.