Ah, this Bukki, you dey find my trouble o! You JUST had 2 tag me ehn? See me enjoyin a well deserved break from the blogosphere, and you no even allow me to come back b4 givin me work. Hmmm, ok o. Let the record reflect that Bukki has been warned o! One more offence and….in short, only God knows what I might do 2 her.
Needless 2 say sha, I was just havin some mad writer’s block. No, it wasn’t actually writer’s block, but I was just too lazy 2 type.
FOUR JOBS YOU’VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE
1. McDonald’s Cashier (this was my first job ever!)
2. Baby Sitter (feels a lot better if u have a cute baby)
3. JOY Magazine (columnist)
4. OK, I’m all out of jobs. Obviously, I’m not what you’d consider workin type. I hope 2 one day hit the lottery jackpot and/or marry a wealthy man.
FOUR FICTIONAL(ish)* JOBS YOU WISH YOU HAD
1. Sleeper – sleep all I want & get paid
2. Shoe Judge – try new shoes, judge them, keep them 4 free…and get paid while doing it
3. Cell Phone Judge – Get paid 2 try new cell phones (of course, I’ll get to keep them & all their accessories)
4. Just have no job, but yet lack nothing financially
FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN
1. Civil War (a Naija comedy)
2. Zeburudaya (not a movie, but I’ll watch reruns without end)
3. Iche Okwu (not a movie either – it’s an Igbo comedy that I could watch 4eva)
4. Friends (still not a movie, but I culd watch reruns 4eva)
*obviously, I’m not a watch-movie-over kinda person, but I can watch comedy series 4eva
FOUR CITIES YOU’VE LIVED IN
1. Leningrad, Russia
2. Jos, Plateau State, Nigeria
3. Maryland, USA
4. Ugh…I think that’s all…
FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH
1. Girlfriends
2. Law & Order (SVU, CI, Original)
3. Smallville
4. Friends & Golden Girls
*Yes, I know I’ve mentioned 5*
FOUR PLACES YOU’VE BEEN ON VACATION/TRAVELED TO
1. Lagos, Nigeria
2. Atlanta, Georgia, USA
3. London (although I was really young, so now, I don’t remember)
4. Hmmm, once again, I think I’m outta places. Damn, I need 2 go out more often
FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY
1. A Whole Buncha Blogs
2. Yahoo.com
3. Gmail.com
4. Ebay (this is a recent obsession)
FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS
1. Suya
2. Pounded Yam & Egwusi soup
3. Cooked Yam & Eggs
4. Isi Ewu
FOUR THINGS YOU WON’T EAT
1. Snails (I’m sorry but they look like vaginas!…and I refuse 2 eat them)
2. Lobsters
3. Crabs
4. Oysters
5. Shrimp
6. Octupus
7. Overcooked rice (ask my grandma 4 details)
8. Smoked Turkey
*oops, you said 4, right?*
FOUR THINGS YOU WISH YOU COULD EAT OR DRINK RIGHT NOW
1. Suya
2. Isi Ewu
3. Some typa sweet juice (anything pls! I need my sugar cravin satisfied b4 I lose it)
4. Gala (gosh, I hope they still make em!)
FOUR THINGS IN YOUR BEDROOM
1. A desk/table (wateva u wanna call it)
2. Bed (obviously)
3. Laptop
4. Book shelf
FOUR THINGS YOU WISH YOU HAD IN YOUR BEDROOM
1. Loads more space (yeah, I agree with LondonBukki on this one)
2. A bigger closet
3. A secretary (LOL. Who’s lookin 4 a job?)
4. A bottomless money safe with unlimited cash
FOUR THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW
1. Long-sleeve t-shirt (blue)
2. Bra (white)
3. Panties (burgandy red) *yes, I know they don’t match!*
4. Earings (silver)
FOUR PLACES I’D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
1. In front of the suya aboki in Naija
2. At the mama put’s joint waitin 4 my xtra large order of isi ewu
3. At the mercedes factory, waitin 4 them 2 finish buildin my custom-made flying car (keep wishin Vera)
4. In bed, receiving a massage from a very strong man, with very strong, LARGE hands
FOUR FICTIONAL PLACES I’D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
*wat is up wit all these fictional kweshionz sef?*
1. A restaurant I described in my novel
2. The ballroom where Cinderella met her prince charming
3. Krypton – Superman’s planet
4. My bed – the one that defies all rules of gravity & floats on my bed
FOUR PEOPLE YOU’D REALLY LOVE TO HAVE DINNER WITH
1. God, and all the people He has confisticated in Heaven
2. My late uncle, George
3. My Daddy
4. Oprah – maybe she can get me a book deal 2 publish my book
FOUR THINGS YOU ARE THINKING RIGHT NOW
1. I’m sleepy as hell
2. I need to get me a creamy cup of capuccino
3. I’ll beat Bukki up when I see her (whenever, wherever, howeva that is!). I wish I could tag her answer this thing with different answers
4. Why have I been fartin so much 2day?
FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE THINGS
1. My laptop
2. Cell Phone (the one I am about 2 buy)
3. My bed
4. My coffee
FOUR PEOPLE YOU TAG
1. Engineer Ayo
2. Diamond Hawk
3. Beautifully Human
4. Kokoro Ewa
5. Overwhelmed Naija Babe
*I had 2 tag every1 on my ‘fav blogs’ list. Calabar Gal & London Bukki, consider urselves lucky*
I’ll be back tomorrow…I think. :))
aaaaaaarrrrgggggghhhhh…i promise you this thing is like HOMEWORK. and im sooooooooooo NOT into homework…lol.
im soooooooo feeling #4 under JOBS and FOOD
LOL!!! yes you should go gout more often. Stop hugging the laptop like I do and GO OUT MORE!!
Babes, you are missing a lot. All those items on ur ‘things I wouldnt eat’ list are absolutely SCRUMPTIOUS! Thanks oh for not tagging me. Buki has already done the deed. I have a whole load of different formats of ‘TAGS’ all waiting for me. Will have to complete them some day soon.
My fellow ex-McD’s employee…
You should thank me AGAIN for bringing you out of your Blogging Laziness oh!
Snails look like Vagina ke???? LOL!!! That’s a first!!!
Gala? LOL!!! I cannot believe you! Do they still sell it in Lagos?
Beat a STRONG RUNNER up? I feel sorry for you. Nonsense and Ingredients!!!
Aint u forgeting one of your favorite places “Adazi Ukwu”. The Isi Ewu stuff, that’s my thing. Looking forwad to it this Xmas.
lol. no matter what you say you aint gonna put me off eating snails, you hear?
whao.. the columnist job sounds sooo much fun.. was it? lol.. its become obvious to me that you love free stuff vera. hold up.. civil war is that the movie with osuofia in it when he came back from burma? igbo movie? girlfriends is the shit esp jill jones (i forget her name on the show)
I actually sat down last year for 30 minutes planning exactly how i’m going to position my mouth to eat suya the day i step into Naija.. trust me.. ITS GOING DOWN!!!\
lol.. say what you want about snails.. THEY are soo good.. havent you eaten fried snail? ofe owerri.. babygirl ur definitely missin out.. so i’m guessin you just dont like seafood.. ps.. SHRIMP IS THE WILL SMITH OF THE SEAFOOD WORLD
Holy Crow.. I’ve been tagged!!!
Diamond Hawk: That one consign you o. You must do this homework. Wat is the use of having you on my fav’s list if I cannot inflict some pain on you? :))
Calabar Gal: Yes, I know I’m missing, but my dear, I’m used 2 being home, and I’m perfectly fine with it. If you leave me, I’ll stay home for a whole month and not feel like I’m missin anything
London Bukki: I don’t care if you’re a runner up o. I’ll panel beat you in2 another shape if you don’t take time. And yes, snails look like vaginas 2 me. I dunno if they still make gala, but I want some!
Anonymous: Who are you? You even know my town sef. Hmmm, you know me too much o! Na who you be sef? Although my town is Adazi Nnukwu, not Adazi Ukwu, but u came close enuff sha.
Beautifully Human: OK oh, but next time you’re eating a snail, just remember what you might as well be eating, LOL
Overwhelmed Naija Babe: Does Will Smith know you’re comparing him 2 snails? LOL. And no, I have not eaten fried snails…whether fried, cooked, broiled, or baked, a snail still looks like vagina 2 me. Of course I love free stuff; do u have any 2 give me? The columnist job…I still have it. I like it a lot.
Jill Jones’s name is Toni. I’m guessin you haven’t seen the new episodes??
I LOVE SNAILS. And yes they do look like vaginas sometimes…but that can neevr put me off. WHats so disgusting about vaginas anyway..God gave them to us you know loll.
U r nuts u this chic ..”Snails (I’m sorry but they look like vaginas!…and I refuse 2 eat them)”
Men i second u on the Food one jere ..miss my mama put scather ..
Nice one sha
TaureanMinx: Yes, you’re right, God gave them to us, but I don’t wanna eat them! I just cannot eat snails; can’t happen.
NaijaBloke: Yes oh, m,y brotha, I know I’m nuts. Wat else is new? LOl.
Lol@givin you freee stuff.. you fancy original Canadian Maple syrup? its the stuff pancake dreams are made of!!!
K so i finally decided to do this your tag.. ARGHHHH>. so long.. but i DID IT!!! check it out
ONB: maple syrup?? That’s the best you can do?? Abeg come up wit something else jare
maple syrup. vera collect the syrup b4 u ask for more now. oliver twister oshi..
That was a funny one, Vera. I’ve read your column and articles in ‘Joy’, very nice writing, keep it up. And I love your blog. This is my first time here, won’t be my last. I feel you on ‘Iche Oku’ o, with that their fake oyibo (where did they get that guy sef?). That show was just too funny. We had some good TV back in the day.