Yesterday, The Federal Executive Council met for an emergency meeting to discuss the subsidy removal — because you know, they too, were surprised to wake up and find out about it. After the three hour meeting, they came up with a logical solution. A solution that will benefit everyone: buy 1600 buses and distribute them around the country.
Of course. That’s exactly what we need! For those who already own their cars or other mode of transportation, they can always put their vehicles in the trunk of the bus and take the bus instead. There! Problem solved. Let’s not worry about who will be paying for these buses, how they will be maintained, how the riders will pay, if they will. The most important thing is that they have awarded contracts among themselves to supply buses. This is great! And you were worried about the subsidy removal??? See, the government has provided not just an alternative, but a solution.
Everyone looks so happy. But why wouldn’t they? They just had a successful meeting where they came up with the most brilliant idea to aid Nigerians in this transition of paying double, triple, and sometimes, even quadruple on everything. What’s there not to smile about?
The government says Nigeria is spending too much money on subsidies. Removing it will save Nigeria billions of money, so instead of wasting all this money on subsidies, the money will be spent instead on building Nigeria’s infrastructure. All things being equal, this is a great idea. The only problem is that Nigeria is known for many things, and equality isn’t one of them. So which one of these incompetent bastards will really take the money home — and buy yet another house in another man’s land — that they will never live in.
And what’s the real reason for the sudden jump in prices? Is it the death to the subsidy? Or the lack of order in Nigeria? And if saving money is the real goal, then how about cutting the salaries and benefits of law makers? How about catching all the thieving law makers and collecting our money back? How about cutting the president’s budget? How can he have a billion naira budget for food??? And how about building refineries? The solutions to our country’s problems are not that difficult. It is not rocket science. If the country is spending too much money on subsidy, then the country should build/fix our refineries. If the country wants to save money, then the country should cut areas where they overspend.
That said, there will be a national (and indefinite) strike in Nigeria starting Monday, January 9th 2012. And over here in the DMV (D.C., Maryland, Virginia) area, Nigerians are still planning to protest in front of the Nigerian embassy in Washington, D.C. I’ll keep you updated. Follow me on twitter for more updates – in 140 characters or less 🙂
you have forgotten the jobs that would be provided…by hiring the drivers…lol
these guys are just a bunch of jokers …seems they already know,judging by their laughter
Serious jokers! LOL @ the jobs for the drivers. Yeye men.
Stupid people… i wonder how they think sometimes… 1600 buses for the whole of Nigeria? Gossh…. did i really vote this guys in?
Femi, I wonder how they think too. How could a bunch of “leaders” come together and decide that this is a solution. I mean, really?!?!?!
When people were voting for this guy because of his name I was laughing cos I knew that with the Nigerian govt a person’s will not change anything about them. When I heard about the 1600 buses yesterday I thought it was related to something else… Seems like the head always changes but the body is still the same. Its time to completely destroy everything, head, body and all. Evil crooks!
I totally agree with you. It really is time to destroy everything because it seems like we just keep getting the same ol’ people in there with different names and faces.
When people were voting for this guy because of his name I was laughing cos I knew that with the Nigerian govt a person’s will not change anything about them. When I heard about the 1600 buses yesterday I thought it was related to something else… Seems like the head always changes but the body is still the same. Its time to completely destroy everything, head, body and all. Evil crooks!
I look at their gluttonous faces stuffed with 1bn food and I want to wish them a horrible fate. yet they are fathers, mothers, aunties, uncles….
I have fantasized about horrible things happening to all of them. Too bad I’m not a witch.
Vera, the humor with which you write makes me want to laff, but it is not funny at all!!!!!….. What are these people really up to??… how about increasing minimum wage across board? it’s easy for them to be merry & shine their teeth because they have their accounts bursting at the seams, nonsense & rubbish!… Mschewwww!
Dalu, lol. Well, I love writing satire, so if you’re laughing, it’s a good thing. But like you said, it’s not a funny thing at all. It’s ajo ife n’ato amu. That’s what mom will call it.