If you don’t know who Mr. Kisser is, please click HERE
Where do I start?? Okay, I’ll start from Sunday morning.
My blogville husband, NaijaBloke (yes, we are still married!) came into town. He forgot his charger, so he came to meet me in church on Sunday morning to get my charger (which he was supposed to give me back later, but forgot to… but anyways… lol). I was to meet him later that night at a big party in Capitol Heights.
But first, I had to attend a little graduation reception. Busola’s sister graduated from high school, so I went over to pay my respects. I didn’t have time to buy her a gift, but I remembered to return her mother’s plate – the one I used to take rice home in May. I was trying to find parking when I drove into something. I thought it was nothing until I was ready to leave and realized I had a flat tire. Crap! My front passenger tire was gone.
Busola’s dad and uncle helped me fix my spare tire. I didn’t even know I had a spare tire and a jack in my trunk. It’s amazing how many things I don’t know about my car. The spare tire, as I learnt from Busola’s dad, was a doughnut. It was one tiny tire that looked like it belonged to a motorcycle.
In spite of my discomfort with the tire, I drove one hour to Capitol Heights to meet NaijaBloke. The party was bubbling. The musician was Mr. Solek. I had never heard about him till that day, but he was really good. The music was the kind that had you bopping your head and tapping your feet unconsciously. I really wanted to dance, but Funmi and the rest were not there to act stupid with me on the dance floor. NaijaBloke was on the dance floor talking with his friends and he asked me to come & dance. I was still sitting down doing shakara… until I spotted Mr. Kisser.
I jumped up from my seat and ran to NaijaBloke. I told him I needed to make a call, so I ran outside & called Funmi. The stupid girl just laughed @ me. I went back inside and went straight to the dance floor. I tried [unsuccessfully] to cover my face with my braids. That dance that I was doing shakara for ehn, I started dancing it immediately. I refused to look @ Mr. Kisser’s face, but I had to watch him from the corner of my eyes to make sure he was not too close.
Eventually, our eyes met. But I chickened out and looked away immediately. LOL. Mr. Kisser kept looking @ me, but I kept dancing and acting oblivious to the pair of eyes that were watching me closely. I knew Mr. Kisser would not approach me as long as I was with NaijaBloke. But when I got tired of the staring, I told NaijaBloke that I had to leave. Really, I was tired, but that was not my main reason for running away. Bloke said I should give him 5 minutes. He went to talk to his friends. Those five minutes felt like five hours. I felt so alone. So vulnerable. So naked! Mr. Kisser was still watching me. He was trying to make me sweat. LOL.
Finally, Bloke walked me outside. If you see the speed I used to drive off ehn… I didn’t even care that I was driving on a doughnut. Kai! Which kin wahala be dis? The reason why I really didn’t wanna talk to Mr. Kisser was because I had been ignoring his calls. I had stopped picking his calls after that one conversation we had where he complimented the ebony skin that I didn’t have.
I told my marine friend about my ordeal, and he had a good suggestion: next time I’m in such a situation, I should approach the person first and accuse him of not calling me or returning my calls. LOL. See me see madness ooo! If I had done that, Mr. Kisser woulda called me crazy. LOL.
Anyway, I fixed my tire yesterday (after visiting 3 different locations under the hot sun). They said the hole was so big that it could not be patched. I got a new tire. Don’t ask me where the hell I drove my car into. I’ve been asking myself the same question. Bloke had the nerves to say that women cannot drive. I go wound pesin oo!
Jaycee says
LOLLLL….FIRSTTTTT!
Vera u shd be happy, at least he only tried to kiss you with his eyes and not his lips this time…lollll…
Vera Ezimora says
Jaycee: Abi oo! LOL. If I had tried with his mouth again, I might have just slapped him this time. Haba!
Celestina says
Oh my gosh. Ur so funny. I just read all your past blogs. I am adding you to my favs.
Vera Ezimora says
Celestina: Aww, thanks babe!! I try. You’re adding me to your faves? I’m blushing multi-colored oo. LOL. I just visited your blog. I’m gonna tell Jaycee to visit ur blog ASAP
bumight says
why are you running away from true love ehn? Lol!
Vera Ezimora says
Bumight: You don kolo finish. Which kin yeye true love be that? LOL. Don’t jinx me oh. True love with someone who doesn’t even know my skin complexion? Abegi…
Sting says
LOL, Vera! You are such a chicken. Poor Mr. kisser, denying him of his true love.
TaureanMinx says
Before we kow it you will tell us you are getting married and Mr Kisser is really a good kisser lol!
Afrobabe says
lmao…I would have done the “why didnt you call me back” thingy…would have said ” I am definately sure I returned your calls, anyway how have you been?”
But he might be the one oh…so he goofed…big deal..I had a guy that forgot to tell me a minor detail like he had 3 kids….No, I didnt go on to date him…..errrrm guess that means Mr Kisser aint the one…lol
nuggetzman says
Vera mai own sista…!
I wish you had put a call thro to ur marine friend well asap b4 driving off cos he who fights and runs away, lives to fight another…like Bob Marley intoned. I once faced dat kain thing during my internship in Enugu.Dia was dis fine final yr medical student babe wey I spotted d 1st day I entered UNTH.Olboy, d babe made my fee buckle…and we wouldn’t look straight at each other so I avoided her much of the 11months at UNTH Enugu.
After my NYSC orientation camp, I came back to pack my Kaya back to Benin…and lo and behold, I met dis babe in the bank wia I go collect my last kobo. I said, no way ..I no go run from dis babe again…so I walked up straight to her,greeted and introduced myself. And guess what? she smiled back and said she used to see me at UNTH…and we talked like say we don sabi far tey…we went back to UNTH 2geda and she even opted and paid my busfare despite my arguing it’s the guy dat shd pay.
But dat was my last day in Enugu and the last time we saw as there no GSM then and we lost touch till day…and I wish I had not run away from her for months!
So call Mr. Kisser and ask him what he wants from you…then you’d be taking the charge and the ace will be on ur side!
Naijadude says
lol.. unfortunately women cannot drive! yeah!!!
AlooFar says
Ha!
I’ll report you to Mr Kisser.
I’m on my way.
How are you? 😉
Vera Ezimora says
Sting: Yes, I am a chicken. I admit to it. LOL. But I’m not his true love biko. Y’ll should not jinx me o.
TMINX: Don’t make me hurt you oh. Which kin Mr. Kisser is a good kisser?? LOL. Even if he is, I will not be the one to know abeg. Mr. Kisser is not the one. We shall never engage in the swapping of spit. Never, ever!
Afrobabe: Indeed, having three kids is a tiny detail. LOL. How does one forget to mention that??? Oh, by the way…I have three kids. As for Mr. Kisser being the one… forget it! He’s not the one. Sometimes, you just know. And I know he’s not the one.
Nuggetzman: Forget it!! You want me to call Mr. Kisser? Hellllll no!!! Actually, it’s not such a bad idea oh. At least, I will not have to be running away from him. If I run into him some place else, I’ll just confidently say hi to him. Kai! Hmmmmmmmmm. *thinking, thinking*
NaijaDude: NaijaDude, stop saying that nonsense oo! Who told you women cannot drive? Don’t make me hurt you.
Aloofar: I ain’t scared! Of course, the only reason why I am not scared is because I know you don’t know Mr. Kisser…@ least I hope you don’t. LOL.
Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) says
I am highly disappointed in u, Vera. So u ran away b’cos of Mr. Kisser? Chicken like u. I was supposed to jam u guys at that party but i had to go look for an apt. Anyway, take care and i’ll still return ur call.
Vera Ezimora says
Cherub: Yes, I’m a chicken. So what? LOL. So you abandoned us for an apartment ehn? Who is more important – Mr. & Mrs. NaijaBloke or your apartment? And why are you even looking for an apartment? I thought you’re leaving MD in a few months abi are you looking 4 the apartment in PA? Anywayz… call me back when you can.
darkelcee says
wetin dey scare u? sebi u will just close ur lips together?lollllll
Sweetie me, on Mr kisser’s case,
the MORE YOU LOOK THE MORE YOU SEE
Vera Ezimora says
DarkElCee: Thanks but I’ll pass. LOL. I shall not let our lips be familiar with each other. It is very unnecessary & err… in short, no!
NikkiSab says
Mr Kisser lol!!!!!! I axd for his pix n u refuse..hehehehe!!!! I would av held 9jabloke and den waved at Mr kisser, den walked out wit 9jabloke and sped off like speed racer.
Afrobabe says
No, he didnt say by the way I have 3 kids…I saw a tiny teddy in his car and asked if there was something about his sexuality he wasn’t telling me…I was actually joking, expecting a favourite neice nephew story, instead I hear, oh..didnt I tell u about my kids?…My mind only hears the s after the kid….when I recovered enough to breath I asked how many…
So what if I had shagged him already, cos in my head I had been rearranging his flat…
THE SHEEP!!!
Vera Ezimora says
NikkiSab: LOL. Don’t even go there. It’s bad enough that I’m slowly but surely losing my anonymity and you’re saying I should put a pikshure of him ke? Then someone that knows him will see it and I will be screwed. LOL. I really woulda loved 2 put the picture up but….courtesy (and fear) demands that I don’t.
AfroBabe: LOL. That’s hella funny. How does one forget to mention their kids? Anyway, he obviously didn’t “forget”. He just remembered not to mention it. If you had not seen the teddies, who knows when or if you would have ever found out. By the the time you found out, you would have already been another kid 4 him. Then he’ll say something like: Oh, I can’t wait to have my 4th kid. Then you’ll pass out.. end of the story. LOL
AustynZOGS says
Vera,
Thanks for the comments you left on my blog.I always remember you for being the first Blogger I ever took interest in.You inspired me
DiAmOnD hawk says
TMinx… I definitely feel what you’re saying…
Vera… you should have walked over to him w/NaijaBloke… and said hiiiiiiiii.
so you and Mr.Bloke have started rendezvousing in varying zipcodes ehn… ku ise o
🙂
Vera Ezimora says
Austynzogs: Awww. Thanks!! I feel all warm & fuzzy inside. LOL. I inspired someone?? Ain’t that something! Thanks, Austyn. Hope you keep blogging.
Diamond Hawk: Oh Darling, but of course! You may have tried 2 come between me & him, but as you can see, your plans failed woefully. LOL. Besides, married people have to party every now & then… whether it’s cyber or life marriage.
The Life of a Stranger called me says
Vera you have deleted my comment, Im sure I was like number 2.. oh well, lol.. hmm this is the second time you are posting about this one guy, and how the first situation has now led to the second. I wont be surprised if I come here and there will be a part 3 – naija movie styles? Im I correct? lol.. oya update.
Doja says
Poor guy he was probably still imagining that kiss he never got.
Vera Ezimora says
Life of A Stranger: Babe, I no know wetin happen to your comment oh. I definitely did not delete it; I didn’t even see it. You know blogger eats comments sometimes. But uhm, hopefully there won’t be a part three to Mr. Kisser. I did not know I was ever going to run into him again.
Doja: LOL. Whatever it was he was thinking of, it made me very, very uncomfortable.
Free-flowing Florida says
i had 2 read d first post on him 2 b sure it was d same person i had n mind dat u were talking abt. & behold, it was!
am surprised u even care abt wot he thinks of u! Jeez, d guy is an asshole! & u were doing speed-racer on him? ah ah! u r a very nice person o. if na me, who gives a shit! ‘yeah? u called & i ddnt pick up? wot abt it? dat should give u a msg.’
Vera Ezimora says
Free-Flowing Florida: LOL. Yes, oh, I’m nice. As much as I would have loved to be that way, it’s just not me. I cannot bring myself to be that blunt. LOL. On occasions where I am that blunt, it means the person must have really, really, REALLY pissed me off. This gal, you’re bad oo! LOL. You sound like my friend, Uju.
The Last King Of Scotland says
some dudes dont and will never get it. u have to be sure she wants it to the point that if u dont make a move she will spend the rest of the night wondering why. anything apart from that is a no no when it comes to kissing women u barely know. i should know…….
Vera Ezimora says
Last King: Abi oo! Thank you jare, my brother! Coz really he had no no no no reason to try and kiss me. There was absolutely no kemistry. Nawa o.
But uhm… this one you said you should know…. wat is the gist here? *wink, wink*
miz-cynic says
abeg , whts with this guy trying to feel mysterious….but come 2 thnk of it its kinda romantic.
Vera Ezimora says
Miz-Cynic: That’s one way to look @ it…
NaijaBloke says
Hmmmm… U know I just dey see this post sha … so that was what happened that day ….. UUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!