“It will be a very big shame for you to get married to an Igbo man and not know how to cook onugbu (bitterleaf) soup.”
Prior to that verbal assault you read up there, I did not know how to cook onugbu (bitterleaf) soup. I was curious enough to ask mom to teach me. Remember that I said I asked her. She did not tell me I had to learn it. I
asked
begged her on my own to show me. We have been attempting to do this mother-daughter cooking for the longest time – I’m talking years now – but you know how time is exactly what we don’t have enough of. Finally, we agreed to do it on Thursday (March 19th), but mom was too tired. I guess that meant it was automatically postponed to Friday, March 20th, but I didn’t know. So off I went to hang out with Funmi #1 and Funmi #2 (Yes, there are two Funmis, but Funmi #1 is the one who comments on my blog).
I decided to call mom at 10:41 PM to check up on her… as per good daughter and all, and that verbal assault up there was what I heard. And after speaking, she hung up on me ooo! LOL. Couldn’t stop laughing walahi. I finally got home more than an hour later to realize the woman had not even started cooking the soup – even though prior to hanging up she said, “Don’t worry, I’m cooking my soup myself” … you know one of those things they say to make you feel guilty. Anyway, I ended up joining her in cooking.
I was required to
wash
scrub the bitterleaves till they were no more bitter. I wanted to wear my rubber gloves because I didn’t want the finger nails I had been growing to turn green after washing the leaves, but I was chastised by my mom, “How can you wear gloves to wash what someone will eat?” After two minutes of washing, I became tired, but I had to keep going; apparently, the leaves were still bitter. By the end of it, I came to one conclusion: I must have a house-help! I am not cut out for this. I refuse to bend over the sink to wash bitterleaves. My mom laughed @ me. She asked, “So you’ll have a house help as soon as you enter your husband’s house?” I said, “Yeap. She’ll be my hand luggage.”
Mom: What if your house help is not Igbo? Or what if your house help is not a female?
Me: I don’t even want a female anyway. Too many house-girl/husband casualties. But if he/she isn’t Igbo, he/she will be trained on how to wash bitterleaves.
Mom: Who will train them?
Me: Obviously not me.
Mom: *Shaking head.* You’re not serious.
Me: Very serious, mom.
Soooo after about an hour in the hot kitchen, a pot of yummy onugbu soup emerged. It is safe to say that I am now ready to be given away to an Igbo man. I took pictures to show you my soup. Oh, but you know what my mom said after we finished cooking? She said, “You know you didn’t learn anything. All you did was walk around here and take pictures; we have to do this again.” Lai lai! We don’t have to do anything again. I have learnt. I’m good.
You know what that is? Blended cocoayam. It makes the soup thicker. In Naija, we woulda pounded it, but as per Yankee, we had to blend it instead.
Voila… the result!
Funmie says
numba 1
Fashinga says
Shet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2nd…brb
Tinu says
3rd!off to read
Funmie says
if i dont my soup tomorrow… the roof is gonna be on fire.
Temite says
all of u people ehhhhhhhhhh
Una no fit sleep?
VERAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I want some SOUP ooooooooooo
I WANT SOME SOUP
I beg come supply me men.
I am ssooooooooooooooooo hungry.
I beg learn oooo
The husband cometh darling!
Temite says
I SHALL COME AND ASK FOR YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE, IF YOU PROMISE TO MAKE THIS SOUP EVERYDAY. DID U NOT KNOW THAT A WOMAN CAN MARRY ANOTHER WOMAN IN IBO KULSHURE NI. YES O. I CAN MARRY U. AND I SHALL. I WILL JUST GET FBA TO DO THE KINI WIF YOU! EHN? DEAL!
(MY CAPS WONT TURN OFF, AND I AM ALREADY IN BED, I NO WAN GET UP TO GRAB DA ODA COMPURA, I BEG NO VEX O).
Good Naija Girl says
Nice work, photographer, I mean Cook Vera! Congrats o; you’re now a pro at cooking this soup.
Step 2: find the Igbo man. Where is he o? 🙂
Nice Anon says
lol @ now ripe to become a wife. Before you were “unripe” abi?
Tay-mee says
This post is just pure torture for me!!!..i have been eating pizza and pasta since January nd now u speak of pounded yam an soup!..highly unfair!..:(
Chari says
wow I am in top 5!!!!
today is a good day mehn!
hehehehe…Onugbu! Interesting I am runnin over to ma neighbour’s to teach me mehn….
Arewa says
wow! it looks so good. i guess u are all ready for marriage, motherhood and grandmahood!
those mothers, before they teach you how to cook anything they will threaten you about marriage. don’t even try to convince them about the whole getting a maid idea.
SHE says
The ingredients don’t look so good. But the result sure does.
there’s a way to avoid squeezing those horrible bitter leaves. I believe you can just boil them for a looooooong time, then the bitterness comes out. But i guess all the nutrients follow as well, so that might not be a very good idea. LOL
Tinu says
Fera Fera Fera!!!!Ore mi atata!!!
would u kindly post some to me!!!!!!
You are truly ready for marriage!
JustDB says
LOL.. Good luck on the Ibo man searh… But you should have told Mami that there was a dude (the Valentine day bobo) and that he’s not ibo…..
In my head and around me says
You are finally worthy of marriage..lol!
O'Dee says
Seems everywr I go some1 is talking about this bitter leaf soup.
Now u r ready to be an igbo mans wife.
Afrobabe says
The stinky thing is actually called locust beans…makes soup yummy but can get you arrested my immigration at the point of entry!!!
Gosh, that soup makes me hungryyyyy…chei. I need to cook me some bitter leaf soup…I hate washing to so I stick to buying washed one…
NoLimit says
Welldone Vera…Igbo man said to tell you he’ll be around in a jiffy!!!
That soup looks groovy…pls mail me some!
cerberus says
Looks Yummy, Please some (enough to feed 3) to
http://tres3uku.blogspot.com
Gracias.
scribble,me.free says
But if he/she isn’t Igbo, he/she will be trained on how to wash bitterleaves.
Mom: Who will train them?
Me: Obviously not me.
lol..good luck with that!
Qube The Wordsmith says
una no dey sleep? kai!
Vera dont wori wen nxt u come ova u wil do d soup for me cos d pics look ril nice yeah….
FFF says
na de thing our mothers dey use deceive us into submission. na igbo man i marry, na so so spaghetti & fried plantain bobo dey chop. so, maybe d igbo man u go marry no go even like to chop naija food. na mexican eat-out he go dey want 4 dinner
ShonaVixen says
Looks yummy!!!Well done Vera and yup m still part of the bridal party!!
Afrobabe darling can you please make some soup and suya??We can even cooking lessons???
Anonymous says
Why are u making me go hungry now? Eeeh Vera. Anyway, the soup looks tantalizing and appetizing… Yours faithfully
fluffycutething says
@Shona- Soup and suya ke???????? You are definetely not ready to be an Ibo man’s wife….
@ Vera- That househelp as hand luggage is the way forward oh,make sure about it biko!!! All that washing of bitter leaf and scraping shaki after work isn’t a good idea i tell you!!!
Dabizniz says
where is the wash-hand water, the Akpu and palmwine to wash it down
Phoenix says
I never liked onugbu soup but meenn that pic is making my mouth water no be small!!!
Nne sendarum obele via fedex o??!!!
BSNC says
hmmmm that looks scrumptous oo.
LusciousRon says
Finally, the last thing the husband is waiting for. I will begin campaigning sorry making applications to all the Igbo men I know.
Msheww! I am hungry. I am taking my lunch break right now.
naijagirl says
Vera oo, the onugbu soup is appealing to the eye
If “Mr” is so in love with onugbu soup, maybe he can learn how to cook it and teach you instead
s.chic says
the end result looks so good…it’s early in the morning and all i’m thinking of now is some pounded yam or eba with that soup…gosh!
wordsmith says
oh my God your mother daughter dynamic sounds just like mine ..except it would be ‘Yoruba man’ LOL
You are almost ready…
CultureCynic says
I don’t need this kiind of distraction early in the morning….WHy am i now suddenly hungry!!! damn…but wait u kno what u don’t actually need a housemaid per sey to do the job,marry you a proper igbo man who loves to cook…alot of them can, they just pretend they can’t(silly boys)…seee problem solved, well partially solved.
Original Mgbeke says
Vera, you aint RIGHT for this. I am HUNGRY, chei chei chei. Abeg fedex me small na.
Your mother dikwa too too funny. E be like say I go come for lessons o ‘cos come to think of it, I can’t cook Onugbu soup.
Confessions of a London gal says
You just had to do this, dint u? Now all i can thing about is food!!!
Kemberly says
LMAO!!! This was such a funny read!!! Omg! Your mom sounds just like mine! And I’m TOTALLY with you on that “having a househelp” as soon as I enter my husband’s house drift!
aloted says
kai Vera..now u’ve made me hungry o…kai…correct soup with all that assorted meat and stock fish!!!! kai kai kai
is ogili the same as iru?..not sure of the english name..cuz we yoruba use it to cook soup as well and it stinks…
so u tink u can cook? 😉
Nefertiti says
Vera, must he be igbo? I have a prospect for you. I dunno if the guy is igbo tho, cos the women at the african market were talking to him in what I assume is Igbo, but he was answering in English, and so I got the gist of the conversation, which was the fact that he was looking for a good Igbo wife (The women were chastising him on coming to the market by himself *Insert a WTFrack look. WTH is their bizness?*) Anyways, I was scoping the dude outta the corner of my eye, and all I could think about was VERA VERA VERA (u have to stop jazzing me o. Why am I thinking about you everytime I see a fine Igbo man? Stop doing that jazz o!) Anyway, I asked my ‘connects’ and someone knows who he is. He lives in Ellicot (sp) city which is pretty close by. I got his CV. Holla @ ur gurl 😉
Chai… see my life!
Tigeress says
yum-yum that looks nice.
Well it seems i’m not cut out to marry an Igbo man cos seems this process is too much wahala.
Btw, i have a nice Igbo Dr. friend here in NJ. Very likeable dude- he’s tall and cute. He was even in MD last weekend. Give a sista a shout if u’re open to the hook-up.
Repressed One says
LOL ur mama funny well well. I dont like ofe onugbu sha but that sho looks good…all that meat and tins chei!!
Yea, Ogili/ogiri= Iru
Vera Ezimora says
Funmie: Go siddon somewhere jare!
Fashinga: Congrats on being second, love. How does it feel? 🙂
Tinu: Congrats on being 3rd. All of una wey dey claim position b4 reading. Una go wound o!
Funmie: Sebi you know the way to my house? If not, just stay there & keep waiting for me to bring your soup 4 u.
Temite: Yes, I have learnt ooo! So I am now ripe to be married by an equally ripe Igbo man. Where him dey na? His soup doth wait. lol @ your caps. Well, if you say you'll marry me, then please hurry! The soup is getting cold. And I promise to cook this soup 4 u everyday. Anything 4 u, my husband. lol
Good Naija Gal: That is the question of the day. I have a clue about his whereabouts, but I go wait. Indeed, step one is now complete. lol @ photographer Vera. Not funny!
Nice Anon: Yes o! Before I was unripe. Now that I can cook onugbu (and not to mention, multi task & even take pictures while @ it), it is obvious I am now ripe 4 marriage.
Tay-Mee: LOL! Did I ever mean to hurt you? No! Besides, you're welcome to come share in this goodness with me. Believe me, it's heavenly.
Chari: LOL! Yes oh. Go and learn sharp sharp. Buttercup will like it; trust me, I know. And yes, today is definitely a good day.
Arewa: Don't mind my mom; she'll be just fine. I will get a maid whether she approves of it or not. How pesin do dey wash bitterleaf every time? Mba now! Ko easy ooo. lol
She: LOL. Uhm define "Lonnnnnnng" please because this your own dey fear me. By the time you finish cooking the thing long, I doubt if there will be any substance. Everything might just evaporate.
Tinu: I'm you ore atata? Ahhh! I'm blushing here ooo! Hehe. Sebi na because of this soup u don dey call me your ore atata abi? No kwamps. Gimme your shipping addy.
Danny Bagucci: This your comment is a little tricky oo. I'm wondering if I should confirm or deny that My Valentine is Igbo, but I'll let it go. My mother will help me find the Igbo man she's preparing me 4. She must already have some1 in mine.
In my head and around: Amen!! Somebori shout alleluia! I am now officially ready marriage.
OluwaDee: Yes oooo! I am now ready to be an Igbo man's wife. So who else is talking about this bitterleaf soup?
Afrobabe: lol @ getting arrested at the point of entry. This ogili we have, we got it from Naija. I dunno how they managed to sneak it in here o. The thing stinks sha. But even after we buy the washed one, we still have to wash it…so says my mother.
No Limit: He said so for real??? Ahh, we thank God oo! Please tell him to hurry. Gimme your mailing address make I mail you some hot soup.
bumight says
ok, now that u can cook the bitterleaf soup, it still remains…..about 5 more soups, lol!
Remi, United Kingdom says
Ah Vera oh! I laughed so hard when I read this..me eh? my name right now is “can cook, won’t cook”! and .I think my ma has soo given up trying to get any cooking out of me.
I agree, u need house maid oh. Check it now, even proverbs 31 woman had house maid ke? Because me I don’t know how she could have done all those things listed (including cooking) without help!
much love
Vera Ezimora says
Cerberus: Oh, of course! I will send some asap. In fact, it will be enough for you, your children, and your children's children. lol.
Scribble Me Free: Na you know oo! Somewhere in Naija, there must be a bitterleaf-washing training school. Abi how you take see am? lol
FFF: LOL. Ain't that something??? So what will happen to your skills?? What will happen to your onugbu soup skills? We can't just throw them away. We must invest.
Shona: Totally awesome gal!! Get ready oh because with each passing day, we are getting closer and closer to the wedding day.
Anonymous: Just say the word and the soup will be mailed to you ASAP. But talk quick oo
FluffyCuteThing: LOl @ your message to Shona. Nne ehn, I will definitely my househelp as hand luggage oo. I no dey play! After I get married, my only job will be to cater to my husband (in and out of the bedroom), but some1 else will have to prep the bitterleaf while I cook abeg.
Dabizniz: My dear, by the time those ones came around, I just couldn't concentrate on the camera anymore. U know now!! LOL @ the wash hand water. Havent heard that in a while.
Phoenix: Nne, the onugbu na bia. Kedu addressi gi? How is it that I never knew you were Igbo?
BSNC: You want some?? Just say the word!
Luscious Ron: LOL. Thank you, love. You're so on top of things! You're the best lawyer ever for real. What will I do w/o you?
NaijaGal: Well, not according to my mother's standards. According to her standards, I must learn the onugbu soup b4 getting married, so now that I have learnt, we don ready na…
S Chic: LOL. Babe, what is stopping you? Don't you live in MD too? Oya bring your butt on over! I will make pounded yam for you oh.
Word Smith: Almost ready ke? What else na? I don learn the Onugbu soup finish. What else? It is time 4 the man to come and marry me.
Culture Cynic: You're right; a lot of them can cook (I know one myself and he's the best cook ever) but I don't want my husband to be wasting time doing too much cooking. Do you know what he could have been doing in all the time he was cooking?
Original Mgbeke: You can't cook onugbu soup too? Ha! That's it o. Ur own don finish be that. No Igbo husband 4 u. LOL. U berra come & take lessons asap. We are currently registering new students. Mekwa osiso
Confessions of a London girl: Everything I do, I do 4 love. U know now!! Think abourrit. lol.
Kemberly: Yes ooo! That househelp thing is a necessity. pesin no fit operate without one of those these days abeg.
Aloted: I don't "think" I can cook; I know I can cook. No try me oo! If you vex me sef, I will go and open a restaurant now now. I dunno if iru is the same thing as ogili. I'll ask Funmi.
Neffie: So you mean to tell me that the jazz I did on you is working, nde? Ah! Na him be say this Babalawo na the original correct babalawo. And there I was thinking juju is deactivated as soon as it crosses the border. As 4 this your hookup, kai.. Neffie… e get as e be oh. But uhm, we go discuss that one on top phone.
Tigress: You too??? You wanna hook me up too?? Ah! It's raining men here. I just don't know if I should shout alleluia. That NY doctor sounds very appealing oh, but uhm… I'll have to pass for now. NY is too far. LOL. btw, you can be married to an Igbo man o. The onugbu soup is not hard to cook @ all.
Repressed One: You don't like ofe onugbu, really? Nne, you dey miss ooo! I didn't like it b4, but now I do.
Bumight: Mind yourself ooo! What are you trying to do sef?? lol. I will learn them all soon, don't worry.
Remi: I like your style jare! U even used bible to support your thesis (abi na theory sef) on having a maid. lol @ can cook, won't cook. I know the feeling, Remi. It is all too familiar to me.
webround says
maybe your mum is indirectly telling you – ‘u better not bring any man home unless he’s Igbo’
meanwhile whether the man is igbo or not, you loved the onugbu soup. twill be a shame if you can’t cook it cos where else will you find it to eat – at a restaurant?
Tee says
That was the most interesting post i came across today. Its so funny.The pics are nice too. hope the soup was sweet oh. Parents and marriage, na wa oh. i support the househelp issue oh. it is needed
Anonymous says
recipe plssssss
Penelope says
oH i luv it wen my mum putss ogili in our soup! so tasty…Buh dang, dat thing stinks ass mahn!
Atleast Your mother only wants you to cook now
My mother wants me to marry a VERY rich igbo man!..So that she and her grand children will Not Suffer!..And he must be a doctor/engineer..She personalli asked for no lawyers!…”i dont kno y, seeing that she’s a lawyer herslf”
Ibo mums nawa oh…
N im not evn half way der to getn married..lol
Me i Like ur mOm oh..U must learnn How to cook dat soup by force by firee!!..Teehee!
x
Ms. SpicyTee says
Vera… This is spicylicious… i’m salivating already,u dey make me hungry now and am on a diet.
Just come and teach me all this soup in person,who knows I might follow an igbo man too. You know d wy to a man’s heart is through a good food and hmmm xxx…
Buttercup says
OMG that looks gooooooooood!
lmao @ ur mom! hhehehehe!
igbo man, where art thou?????
bob-ij says
lol…Vera! But it’s true though. Onugbu soup is a basic requirement for any igbo man!…You’ve achieved…I really should learn o!…
LOl…Were your nails yellowey…yo! When my mum used to force me that was the worst part.. A youngin like me…lol
It’s true tho, you were just taking pictures of the food!
x!
princesa says
Congrats on your ‘ripening’dear Vera,lol!
Onugbu soup is so delicious but the hard part is the washing of leaves.
And that smelly ogiri…hmmmm!
Once I cooked Onugbu soup in my uncle’s house and put too much Ogiri in it the whole house stank for almost two days,lol! serious!!!
PS: Why do i get the feeling, u didnt wash that Onugbu leaves from scratch? As in it was already partly washed before you started 😉
bArOquE says
your mum is very funny…
well, at least you washed the leaves in the sink…(you were supposed to squat or kneel on the ground & wash it in a metal basin) LOL.
jokes apart sha, it is in your best interest to learn to cook stuff like that & very well too
AustynZOGS says
Haba Vera,
Why are you doing this?
I wish you can see how you made my mouth to salaivate on sighting your Onugbu soup.I hope all the Igbo men home and abroad will not start a reality show contests just for your hand in marriage.
Chei,Nne,i dikwa too much!!
flabby says
i waaant!!
but whats the point of it being bitterleaf soup if the leaves are not bitter?
xx
doug says
Lol…My people – or at least my mothers people – call that soup “ataama”.
And you spent the whole time taking pictures??!!!! How are you sure you learnt anything??!!!
Unfortunately I ain’t Igbo :(‘
Omotee! says
see dis vera o! taking pictures? how will u learn the other soups? oha soup, white soup etc?!?! u tink say u ol’ pass spanking?
Rosie says
Ya know, I knew this blog would be useful someday. I have been trying to cook onugbu for a while…so far i have been successful in ogbonno, okro and egusi. Thanks Vera. Your future husband should count himself lucky you are willing to go through all these verbal assault for him.
Rosie says
Also – post the entire recipe. My oyibo boyfriend loves goat pepper soup…maybe he will love onugbu. Sometimes, I think he was mistakenly born in yankee.
j.ifeme says
Hmmm…that was just once. onugbu is better on fireword.And you have to know how to cook ofe Nsala too. Yes. And it goes down well with Akpu and….and…
Vera you better come home!
My World says
So when ishe wedding??? hope i would get an invite??……
Anonymous says
You are too funny, Vera
keep up the good work
Jaguda says
d assorted meat is quite nice. yummy
adifferentnaijaspec says
hmmmmm yummy…
But dis babe ur such a joker, i am sure u did nothing but take pictures… oh and d bitter leaf washing
Vera Ezimora says
Anonymous: Thank you!! Hope you keep reading too.
Sirius: Nne, oya bia now. I will give you some. Actually, never mind. The soup is finished. I’m looking forward to cooking egusi soup now. U want some?
Jaguda: Do you want some? I am a cheerful giver oo; I’ll share.
ADifferentNaijaSpec: So you’re taking my mother’s side now abi? I did more than take pictures oh, haba. Next time, I’ll cook it all by myself from scratch and you people will be surprised.