Ehennnnnn! Ladies, ladies, ladies, I know you want to support your man; I know you earn more money and you don’t want to send the kids to strangers, so instead, hubby is home taking care of the kids. According to what I just read, stay-at-home dads are more likely to cheat on their wives.
On the other hand, wherever multiple women are gathered, the issue of men always comes up: why do men cheat? Do all men cheat? How do you spot a potential cheat? How do you know when a man is cheating? What can you do to stop a man from cheating? And errr, what kind of man is even more likely to cheat? These are just a few of the questions women always ask. Well, turns out that the more economically dependent a man is on his wife, the more likely he is to step out on her.
All things considered, there are about 154,000 to 1.4 million stay-at-home dads. This number includes men who are just temporarily out of work, men who work seasonally, and men who are in and out of jobs. So why are they more likely to cheat? Well, there are two things to consider when we talk about why he’s at home: is it because he has chosen to be a stay-at-home dad? Or is it because he cannot get a job due to the recession? The latter threatens the man’s masculinity.
The more threatened a man’s masculinity is, the more frustrated he becomes. And he overcompensates by engaging in risky behaviors: violence, drugs, and yes, extra women. The reality is that we often equate a man’s “man-ness” to his ability to provide, to be the breadwinner. So when you have a man who is a stay-at-home dad because he has no other choice, he feels threatened. While money is clearly not a way for him to prove his masculinity – seeing as he’s jobless and and all, sexual conquests, however, is another way. In other words, if he is not the man by way of provision, then he can be the man by way of … errr … organism provision????????????????
There is only one lesson here: men shouldn’t be stay-at-home dads. This sounds like a show topic on its own. What do you think about stay-at-home dads?
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I assume a stay-at-home-dad (keyword here is dad) is taking care of the kids. If he’s taking care of the kids, then I expect he would be tired at the end of the day or most times, and might even be too tired to have sex with his wife or another woman for that matter.
For the man who is stay-at-home and not taking care of kids, if he has to prove his masculinity, wouldn’t he demand more sex than ‘normal’ from his wife? Why would he want to go outside? He might only start going outside if he feels he’s not getting enough from the wife.
I think men who have a stay-at-home-wife are more likely to cheat. If the wife is taking care of the kids, it becomes an all-consuming job for her. She’s tired, stressed out, stops dressing well and practically has no time for the hubby who then begins to look outside. Even if she’s not taking care of the kids, there’s the probability that she stops ‘paying attention to herself’ or you hear the man complaining the wife is no longer attuned to the ‘outside’ world and that he can’t have a stimulating conversation with her, he can’t come home and talk about office stuff with her so he starts looking outside for somebody with whom he could have an ‘intellectual’ conversation with. But as my people would say – ‘all na excuse joor…..’
Mmmmm. I get where you’re coming from, but I think I also understand where the article is coming from. You know, generally for men, sexual conquests are also a way to prove their masculinity, just like their ability to provide. Oh, we’ll. I guess it could go either way really. As long as it’s not my husband, everything is okay with the world. Lol.
Stay-at-home dads…hmmm! Sounds like extracurricular lol! I know who will like to be a stay-at-home mom *cough*. I doubt if African men will love this position at all.
Ps: Vera, return my item(s)
xoxo
Stella
Dear Uzo, I don’t know what items you are referring to. And lol at the stay at home mom. Ngwa nu, touch the person you’re talking about. And yeah, I don’t think African men would want the stay-at-home dad position either.
Nice article, would have been better if the statistics reflected which type of men, i.e europeans, asians, africans etc… also religion wise
my point is simply this, I am usually skeptical about statistics, because of the credibility of the sources, is like asking a thief to fill a questionaire and expecting him to answer in truth on why he is a thief? unless the statistics wre gotten from the vatican (confessions) which is not possible, i really do doubt any article professing statistics on men or women especially on cheating… as a guy, although I am african, although I am more christian than African in character, I do not see anything wrong in being a stay at home dad, and I do not see myself cheating to prove my masculinity, a cheat will always be a cheat and will find an excuse for cheating, either he be stay at home or a workaholic, my advice to ladies, know a man’s character and principle(s) and encourage him in the right
You do make a fine point about a cheat always being a cheat regardless of his situation. Perhaps, cheating men who are stay at home dads cheat twice as much? I don’t know.
Stay-at-home-oginni? Abi, shekini? He had had better get his trifling ass out of the house and get a J.O.B before I call Gwen Guthrie on his a***! Hasn’t he heard the saying ‘No romance without finance? (Yes! That was the song sung by Ms Guthrie) that was an anthem back in the day). Cheating that what happened? If I can hold my eye from roving, so can he! Period! *muttering; aint got time for Naija men making excuses like some lame-ass oyinbo/akata men! *Hisss!
Looool! Miz B, at you vexing? Hahaha.
My husband cheated and through therapy I’ve discovered his motive was to prove masculinity. I make twice as much money as him and he also was on unemployment for almost 2 years a few years back. I couldn’t agree more with this article.
Oh, wow. I am so sorry to hear that. I wish you both the best moving forward. Thanks for sharing.