But who has that kind of time??? When I heard that 99% of a woman’s orgasm is mental, I went through a series of emotions that I cannot even put a name to. There are so many reasons why this percentage did not (and still does not) sit with me. Continue to find out.
Excuse the White-woman picture. I couldn’t find one of a Black woman that did not look like it was hard core porn – not that I would know what that looks like anyway.
See, if 99% of our orgasm is credited to our ability to channel our minds into the orgasm zone (this is not an official location; don’t look for it), then what do we need the 1% for? Why do we bother having sex if the explosion-of-a-volcano-like feeling at the end is mostly dependent on our minds being able to picture it? We might as well have sex by ourselves, no? Of course, of course. Some of us you already do that. I know. But that one is conditional. We You do it because you have no other choice. At least, that’s the general consensus. But that’s not all about women’s orgasm. There’s more.
- Only 35% of women experience orgasm during intercourse.
- 43% of women have problems with their sex life.
And the one I found particularly funny: studies show that parts of a woman’s brain are deactivated during orgasm, especially those involved in emotion. Well, this must explain why after the orgasm we they get the “Oh, shit” feeling. It’s because after the orgasm, the parts of our your brain that were deactivated are now reactivated. All of a sudden, your emotions remember that the person you’re lying next to still hasn’t paid child support for your three children. I don’t know. That’s how I imagine it.
But you know what’s ironic? It’s that something as physical as sex is almost completely dependent on the psychological. Why can’t we just get some natural lubrication (i.e. the wetness that flows from within), get a few strokes, and bam! We’re speaking in Japanese French with an Igbo accent. Why do we have to focus our minds?
But if it is true that 99% of our orgasm comes from our mind, then what the heck gives those men the right to say things like, “I gave you multiple orgasms …”? Next time a man says something like that, you should respond with, “No, you did not! I did 99% of the work. You only thrusted.” That would be pretty accurate, right?
Do you realize that the effort you put into giving yourself an orgasm is higher than the effort the condom puts into protecting you from unwanted pregnancies and STDs? Condoms are only 80% effective, meaning that 20% of the time you’re using them, you might actually get pregnant. Factor in the fact that you’re also doing 99% of the work to get an orgasm, is it really worth it?
So I know what the men must be thinking, “This Vera is mad oh! She’s trying to put sand in our garri.” Well, no, not at all really. So what is the point of this post, you wonder? The point is that the time spent in self-inflicting an orgasm and the money spent on buying condoms could be spent on doing something more productive: buying me shoes and bags (and this applies to both women and men). Walahi, I need them die 😀
ImLuvinVera says
“Do you realize that the effort you put into giving yourself an orgasm is higher than the effort the condom puts into protecting you from unwanted pregnancies and STDs? ” Kai, walahi Vera you don craze patapata!!! I wan laugh die!
Vera Ezimora says
Hahaha. Thank you!!! And I love your name “ImLuvinVera” Tehehe. What I wrote is the truth though. We work harder than the condoms, and I don’t understand why. LOL.
Aaron says
Vera, that 99percent mental means that she bonds with the man she is with mentally. and he must reach her at a place other than the physical. its like some men can neva get an erection with some women. So in the end if she gets multiple orgasms then the man must be doing something right, from saying the right things to touching the right way, foreplay and co.
Your theory (of the woman doing the mental thing while the man only thrusts) will hold true if the man can boast of multiple orgasms with every man she sleeps with and even if he does it as insensitively as slapping her face, tearing her clothes and mounting her solely for his pleasure.
Vera Ezimora says
All those things you described at the end (tearing her clothes, slapping her face, etc) are some woman’s fantasy. I get where you’re coming from, but there’s more to it. Beyond bonding with the man mentally, she has to switch gears and be in a sexual place where she has to let go, no inhibitions, no worries, nothing else on her mind but the current task at hand. It’s harder to get an orgasm out of a woman than it is to get an ejaculation out of a man because we use more of the mental thing than men do.
Lanretall says
vera u don start again… u wan compare shoes and bag to that thing… abeg.. stop that if your playing … U don use the Bag and Shoe for ur closet finish..
No pour Sand for our Garri abeg.
Vera Ezimora says
LOL. You sound like I’ve hurt your feelings. You don’t want anything messing with “that thing” but you sef, check am nah … would you rather do that thing or buy me shoes? The correct answer is to buy me shoes. 😀
Myne Whitman says
The brain is your biggest sexual organ, and even for men too. 🙂
Vera Ezimora says
I’m gonna make love to someone’s brain
morai says
i don’t think the woman will go mad bcos she been ejaculated, therefor stop these story-story
Vera Ezimora says
Huh?
Dianaplz says
some men cant accept the truth … i know im extra late but anywho i didnt even understand the hype of sex my first yrs of sexual intercorse until being in love and realizing my mind is what really does it for me I think of the beauty of bonding going on.
long says
David shade
vanessa says
Wow….i love ur blog…
Vera Ezimora says
Awww. Thank you, Vanessa!