Funny Archives - Page 43 of 51

April 16, 2009

What Recession???

In spite of the economic strife that everyone finds him/herself in, I remain untouched. I am not even perturbed by all the financial woes that people are in. I'm sorry that people are losing their homes and jobs, and I'm sorry that some people don't even have food to eat, but as for me, the economic wahala is yet to touch me. And considering this genius idea that I have for staying afloat, I can go ahead and assume that I will be just fine. No, I do not have a mega-paying job...and neither Read More

April 13, 2009

Unlawful Prisoning of Condoms

Dear readers, how was your Easter? Hope good. If so, to God be the glory. The main aim of writing this post... Oh, the good ol' letter-writing days in secondary school!Soooo... I was jejely (innocently minding my business) walking past the condom aisle in Giant Food Store when I spotted the unimaginable. I had to go back and take a second look. Yeap, Giant locked each box of condoms in a plastic, indestructible box. (Okay, maybe it was destructible, but still...) Imagine that!Look @ this; Read More

March 29, 2009

What Happens When…

...you're boiling eggs and you let the water dry out?Apparently, the eggs explode!Now, before you go judging me, I was not the one who put the eggs on fire; my mother did - although she did tell me to watch over them. But in my defense, she obviously put too little water because it was barely five minutes after she told me to watch them that the eggs exploded. Alright, fine. The truth is that it was about thirty forty-five minutes after she told me to watch them that the eggs exploded... and I Read More

March 26, 2009

In Preparation For Marriage….

"It will be a very big shame for you to get married to an Igbo man and not know how to cook onugbu (bitterleaf) soup."- Spoken by Vera Ezimora's mom on Friday, March 20th 2009 10:41 PMYou know, sometimes, I just don't understand my mother. When and where did she see an engagement ring on my finger? To my recollection, I have not told her that any man - let alone an Igbo one - is seeking my hand in marriage. She has not told me that any Igbo man has come to pluck the ripe flower in our garden Read More

March 25, 2009

Facebook – The 9th Planet

We used to have nine planets (Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto), but Pluto became a dwarf planet (an object in space). Facebook has since taken its position. With over one hundred and fifty million active members, Facebook has earned its place in the world of legendary planets. The only difference between Facebook and the other planets is that Facebook is virtual…and like all virtual worlds, it is full of surprises. Read More

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