Meeting a man without having to join some singles’ network: + $300
Having said man ask you for your number: + $100
Realizing he has a good job and mentally calculating your future good life (come on, we all do it!): + $ 100, 000
Realizing he’s a mighty good dancer: + $300 (You don’t have to pay for dance classes)
Finding him kinda, sorta cute: + $1000 (you won’t be ashamed to show up with him in public)
Realizing he @ least attends church: + $500 (you won’t have to buy books to explain to him why church is imperative. And hopefully, he comprehends spirituality and being born again; if not, there are ways to change that….including but not limited to twisting of the arms, pulling of both ears, pinching of both nipples, sexual starvation, kicking of the groin, slapping of the cheeks, pointing of a gun to his head, violent smacking of his butt cheeks, etc….you get my drift. He’ll come to Jesus after one or all of these).
Finding out he asked You and Your Friend out….and gave you both different names: PRICELESS
There are some things in life that money can’t buy. For everything else, there is Mastercard….to pay for the private investigators who will investigate our toasters….and reveal a few things…like the probability of them asking our friends out!
FYI: Funmi is the one I’m talking about here. Sadly, I’m the other friend. Cruel, cruel world. lol. Please send all your condolences to Funmi; she’s the one who thought he was cute …. and a good dancer … and all that ish.
But in his defense, he didn’t lie about his name. Let’s say his name is Wesley. He told Funmi his name is ‘Wes’ and he told me his name is ‘Lee.’ So technically, he didn’t lie. And he asked Funmi out first. So Funmi is the iyale and I’m the iyawo. Sebi that means I’m the hotter one?? Obviously, Funmi musta been doing something wrong. That’s my story and I’m sticking 2 it!
Read Episode 1 of my priceless series HERE
FURSTTTT!!!!!BRB
LOL!!! not just at the post but at the speed I typed my first comment! this “furst” virus is deep in my blurd o!
Now to the post…For real? and what did you guys do to this weasel of a guy?
Ok let’s just have a good xmas laff…one of you shld invite him over and both of you should be there at the same time!!! ha ha ha!!!
pls ensure there’s a photographer in place to capture the look on his face(priceless!!!)…
bloody ol’ nincompoop…
LMHO at the 'Wes' & 'Lee' concept, (have you wondered what name he'd have to use if there were a 3rd babe???) and about you being 'the hotter one' since you're the iyawo.
But seriously, NoLimit's suggestion sounds like a plan. I'd consider it if i were you. 😉
if there was a 3rd babe probably snipes.
This is just too funny.. I guess since your name is VeRa, you could tell some its Vee, and the others Raa, I think there’s more to this gist.. Im expecting a follow up..
ahahahahah… Vera you are a big…….( ah! am just gonna shout RESTORE!!!)
I DON’T BELIVE YOU BLOGGED ABOUT THIS….eh! Vera.
But sha bloggers, sadly this storry is kinda true sha…..yes, the guy has a good job dat pays well, he goes to church ( same church as moi, but wait o, i neva see him at d singles meetings…could be married for all i know), heck! the guy can DANCE TOO.. i saw him booing in church and all i could do was to steer….. but “Wes” and “Ley” oh no…..
**** by d way, this is the first time dat Vera and I have attracted the same guy sha and that/this is just not right! does dat mean that we haVE A CHANCE OF FIGHTING OVER BUSOLA’S HUSBAND…..Vera, I am watching you closely*****
LMAO!!!! Wes and Lee ko! Lee and Wes ni! But the guy sure does have a nerve pulling such a stunt, tho it does strike me as a really juvennile stunt!
Hmmm.. wonder what the dude was trying to achieve.. maybe he was just “testing the waters” to see which part of the river would not be too deep to swim in you know……
Might have gotten scared by the demand for the 2010 range rover u know… LOL..
Methinks you should carry out the plan of inviting him over and letting him know you three are all “friends”.. now that would be a priceless experience…
The guy does not know that Vera n i are frnds…..
i started reading and almost thought u were someone else i know…had the same thing happen to me one time…
babe in question and i were just chit-chating one day and she had finished her gist bout the guy when i said mine…
incidentally, her story sounded so familiar i decided to share a similar experience…
come to find out it’s the same guy..lol
apparently, she also knew he was called by the other name he gave me…
we both decided to keep it ourselves because we thought it was embarassing…lol…
By the way, guy lives in MD too…lol
You guys should have laid a trap for him. One of you should go out with him and then have your friend accidentally bump into you during dinner or going to a movie, then watch things play out nicely…
“hey wes, this is my friend.”
“we already met. how are you lee?”
“Wes hon? why did she call you lee?”
“Lee dear why is she calling you hon?”
All this MD guys sha, na wa for all of dem. Tufiakwa! O gini? Are u sure that he is not some mofo I dated a few years back? This one doesn’t go to church so it’s unlikely. Whenever I need to talk about the guy, I have to use all his aliases. Some know him as Toks, Tokunbo, Ayo, Abayomi, dotun, Alex…. ati beebee lo. May God help us in this MD. When next a guy asks you out, pls ask for his government ID, like Drivers licence, and every other variation/ derivative of his name. Heeeedyooots!
lol…this is too funny. Eya for Funmi. Well, playing Devil’s advocate, if he didn’t know you two were friends and he isn’t exclusively seeing one or the other, then it’s fair game.
No Limit: Congrats on being first, but you’re so evil. lol. Y would you suggest such a thing, ehn? i don’t like it ooo. Sooooo, think you could be the photograoher @ the event? lol.
Vivacious n Chic: Babe, I dunno what woulda happened if there was a third chic o. Only God knows. And I stand by my claim…I am the hotter chic! No Limit’s suggestion is evil.
Jaguda: Hahahaha @ Snipes. Abi oooo. Hehehehehe. Only you, Jaguda.
Life of a Stranger: LOL @ Vee and Raa. Yes o! Technically, I won’t be lying, abi?? For now, there isn’t more 2 the story…unless Funmie decides to update us. As far as I’m concerned, it is finished on my side.
Funmie: There is no need 4 us to fight over Busola’s husband. You know who I have my eyes on (and yes, he’s also relatd 2 Busola). The only reason we attracted the same guy is because he obviously doesn’t know what he wants. What insult! I fine pass you ooo! lol.
Mizchif: Yes, juvenile indeed. I can’t imagine why he did that, but whatever.
Danny Bagucci: LOL. One thing is for sure. You bloggers are mean! You all want us to meet, huh? Well, I’m not interested. Funmi can have him. lol.
Funmie: How did you even get internet??
S Chic: LOL. Wetin we go do about these Maryland guys ehn? Wetin we go do??? Nawa.
Rosie: LOL. Hahahaha. That sounds like a Naija movie. LOL. Hahaha. That is hilarious!
Nefertiti: LOL. Hahahahaha. Haba! All those aliases for only one person? Chei. Well, babe, you’re right oh. I will definitely be asking for government id, birth certificate, social security number, affidavit from the police department, and @ least three references.
Abbie: LOL. You’re right sha, but I’m honestly not interested in him anyway, so it’s fair game for Funmi, and I have told her to not let him go on my account. I mean, if he’s dumb, playing games, etc, then sure, she should definitely cut him lose. But yes, you’re definitely the devil’s advocate, gal! lol
Buahahhahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Laughing my ass off! That is tew funny. So what did you two do to him? Come on you have to get back at him in some way. Bombastic Idiot!
I just realised I am number 15. Urghhh!!! See what Finals is doing to my FURST!!! Crown.
i’m with Rosie
can we get a pic of his face after u act out the movie???????
haha…sucker! It would be so awesome if you and Funmi could both be together the next time you see him.
Although, to his credit, he hasn’t done anything wrong yet. He found you both appealing so he reached out. He asked you both on a date right, not to be his girlfriend? He doesn’t know if either of you will actually be “the one” so he’s trying to keep his options open. If he knew you were friends and still did this, well then he’d be a true jerk.
Temite: We didn't do anything 2 him oh. Sure, it was funny to me & Funmi when we found out, but technically, he didnt do anything wrong. Neither of us was dating him. All we had done was exchange numbers. Sooooo…. me I don't care jare. As for your first position, don't worry, I totally understand. I've been slipping in my blog patrolling too.
Ibiluv: LOL. Lai lai. Una no go get me sef. U want someone 2 catch me & beat me up abi? I no fit fight abi.
Good Naija Girl: I totally agree with you. I can't call him a jerk because for all he knows, he's tryna find himself a girl. I can be guilty of the same thing in a different way – giving my number to more than one guy. So hey…
LOL @ the splitting of the name. That most definitely is very creative. I give him points for that.
lmao……… PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!
the guy has game o……. ey, stick to ur story1 we believe you….lol
lol
vera, they call it “parallel processing” – asking out 2 babes at the same time. maybe he’s following the rule – do not put all your eggs in one basket. Unfortunately for him, the gods decided to pour sand in his garri by making the two ladies involved to be friends…
Hilarious – and yes – priceless indeed!
Sting: I cannot help but give him points for that too. Creativity shows itself in so many different ways!
Fumms: Thank you oh, my dear! I will definitely be sticking to my story. And when I’m recounting this funny story to my children, you bet I’ll be telling it the same way too.
Webround: So that’s what it’s called ehn? Parallel processing indeed. Well, I thank God for whoever put sand in his garri. That’s what he gets. Next time, he won’t try that kinda nonsense again.
Darius: I know, right? LOL. The things I’ve gone thru…. *shaking head*
Hee-laaaa-rious!!!! Poor guy. I understand the whole pursuing many avenues thing, but what’s up with giving different parts of the name? Is he trying to create an alter ego?
Off Topic and Random Thought: Blogland is very small. Mizchif commented on my blog recently and I usually read Darius’ blog.
Dont worry when he meets the 3rd person he will be Wesley and to the fourth Leewesy. lol
But he is a she na?
Fighting with ma blog?
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahhahahhahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Abeg ribs dey pain me oh…
Imagine…Wes and Lee….nope he sure didn’t lie about his name…
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhahahahhaha… kai…Naija men!!!
Abi no be naija man?
LOL!!! Iyawo…spray me some of your magic dust abeg…but not for a Wes or Lee type of man oh. I want th real stuff!
AuNaptural: My dear, I don’t know why he felt the need to give different parts of his name. Maybe he assessed us and we looked like people who would like either ‘Wes’ or ‘Lee’ better… me I dunno. But uhm yea, Blogville is a small, big world. You’d be surprised.
Standtall: lol @ being Wesley to the third person. Honey, no oh, not fighting with your blog @ allll!!! What I’m fighting with is time….and all my final exams, of course. Next week, I will resume my normal schedule, I promise you that much.
Afrobabe: Na Naija man ooo! Of course, na Naija man. Who else will do something so funny?? You know Naija men and their sense of humor. lol.
Anyaposh: LOL. I’m not sharing my dust oo! I wanna use it to catch the real thing abeg. I have plans 4 him. I have plans 4 all the things we will do together. You don’t even know girl. But are you sure you don’t want the ‘Lee’ part of Wesley? Cause you know that part belongs 2 me and I’ve given him up. lol.
Nice player.
read the first one..that was hilariousssssssssssssssssss!! lol
lmaaaaaaooooooooo! ol’boy that was really funny. Apparently the dude is not quite as slick as he might’ve thought.lol
Hope funmi isn’t losing any sleep over it.
So I guess I can be Doug and Las. hehe
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! woah!!!!! BAHAHAHAHAHQAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!…ok am done laughin ehn..PELE to both of u!!!
Azuka: Nice ko… funny ni
Mimi: LOL. You see how I suffer abi? LOL. Soooo not fair o!
Doug: Nah, Funmi is not losing any sleep over it – none that I know of anyway. Hahahahahaha @ Doug & Las. Yes, you kuku can be oh. lol.
Ms O: Let this be the last time you laugh @ me like this again ooo! Don't make me hurt you. Nonsense. lol.
kai, the guy is just a joker! what impetus? LMAO but really he must be hawt! abi vera?
nawa o…something similar happened to two friends of mine..and we set him up (which one is my own abi?)..he was so embarrassed.
i am definitely with Rosie on this one..
hehehe
2 words: KILL SOMEBODY!
Dark Elcee: Well, beaurry is in the eye of the beholder abi? He’s not bad looking 2 me. But I wouldn’t use ‘Hawt’ that’s 4 sure.
Aloted: LOL. Hahahaha. Y’ll set him up for real? Oh, Lord! That’s serious sha. Well, I’m really not bothered by this guy so setting him up will take wayyy too much energy abeg.
Buki: LOL. Mba ooo! He’s not even worth it sef.
VERA! I GO BEAT YOU O!!!
I cannot believe I actually called the Number. I will find a way to get you back!!!!!! Bombastic kolommental crazieeee chic! I dey vex o!
hehehehehehe!!!
hahahahahahahahahaha!
lolololol!
:DDDDDDD
roflmao.
this has actually happened to me in the past, but what he didi was use the same lyrics for both of us!!
Temite: I understand your anger. It’s a sign of the illness. lol. But honey, the first step to healing is acceptance. You must first accept that you’re ill, so tell me darling, what number did you press??? Hehehe.
Geisha Song: LOL! That lyrics thing sha…. hahhahaha. Well, I guess y’ll brought the same song 2 his heart.
Lol!
Iyawo!
OluwaDee: Yes oh, that’s me! LOL.