{"id":7387,"date":"2013-08-01T02:45:29","date_gmt":"2013-08-01T06:45:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/verastic.com\/?p=7387"},"modified":"2013-09-04T22:48:11","modified_gmt":"2013-09-05T02:48:11","slug":"throwback-thursday-bless-me-father-for-i-have-kissed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/personal\/throwback-thursday-bless-me-father-for-i-have-kissed.html","title":{"rendered":"Throwback Thursday: Bless Me Father, For I Have Kissed"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Kiss.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-7388\" alt=\"Kiss\" src=\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Kiss-300x231.jpg\" width=\"300\" height=\"231\" srcset=\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Kiss-300x231.jpg 300w, https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/08\/Kiss.jpg 516w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a>This post was <a href=\"http:\/\/verastic.com\/social\/bless-me-father-for-i-have-kissed.html\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>originally posted in March 2009<\/strong><\/a>, and I find it even more interesting now. Since I cannot commit to putting up an old picture of me every Thursday &#8211; not even on Instagram &#8211; I can at least put up old posts &#8211; not every Thursday though. Enjoy.<\/p>\n<p>______________________________________<\/p>\n<p>\u2026 My last kiss was \u2014- well, let\u2019s leave that alone. There is no need to put that on here now, is there? You and I both know the answer. Let\u2019s leave it between me, You, and\u00a0<em>him<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>A while ago, I attended a Singles\u2019 Dinner\/Conference in church. Funmi was there. Ibukun was there. Even three year old Ireti was there. She\u2019s single too, you know. The event was really nice, and I was glad I went. They (the married folks) advised us (the single folks) on how to live the godly single life. Some of the things they told us, I already knew\u2026 like sex before marriage is fornication. When a married person has sex with someone other than his\/her spouse, that is adultery. All kinds of sex before marriage is a sin. Yes, so whether you engage in vaginal, oral, anal, or whatever other orifice (nose, ears, etc), it is still all sex\u2026 and still all fornication. I was not surprised about that.\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/afrolicious-babe.blogspot.com\/?zx=75ca97fed30fc678\" target=\"_blank\">Afrobabe<\/a><\/strong>,\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/shonavixen.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>Shona Vixen<\/strong><\/a>,\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/ibiluv.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Ibiluv<\/a><\/strong>,\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/www.rocnaija.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Roc Naija<\/a><\/strong>,\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/freetherapyorelse.blogspot.com\/2009\/03\/pride-in-obv.html\" target=\"_blank\">Ms Sula<\/a><\/strong>, and\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/wherewordsaresold.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Word Merchant<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0\u2026 sebi una dey hear me so?<\/p>\n<p>But eventually, I became very surprised by some of the things I heard. Apparently, oral sex between married couples is also a sin. Honestly, I didn\u2019t know that. I thought it was okay. But apparently, it\u2019s perversion. They said it\u2019s unnatural sex. I don\u2019t know what to make of this news. I\u2019m not going to tell you otherwise because I would not want to mislead you against the word of God. The truth of the matter is that I am still very confused. For some reason, I was under the impression that it was okay for married couples to have oral sex.<\/p>\n<p>But it gets worse. Before marriage, I am not allowed to do several other things. They are<strong><em>\u201ckissing, necking, smooching, caressing\u2026 and even fantasizing.\u201d<\/em><\/strong>\u00a0Haba!!! Body no be firewood na! What am I supposed to do when I have a fiance? Shoot, forget fiance. What am I supposed to do when I have a boyfriend? Shake hands??? Oh, and hugging is not recommended either. It\u2019s not a sin, but it\u2019s not recommended because it can lead to the temptation of kissing, necking, caressing, smooching\u2026. and heavens forbid\u2026. fantasizing!!! And once you fall into the temptation of kissing (or any other of the abominable acts), you may very well fall into bed and indulge in\u00a0<em>a form<\/em>\u00a0of sex. In case you\u2019re wondering, the following are also all sins: masturbation, hand job, fingering, and the weird thing where you cocoon the man\u2019s member between your breasts. Of course, threesomes and orgies are major sins! Now,\u00a0<em>that\u2019s<\/em>\u00a0perversion.<\/p>\n<p>What to do\u2026 what to do. I have kissed. And lemme not lie, the kiss was baaaaaad! Bad as in\u00a0<strong><em>when-can-I-get-the-next-installment kind of bad<\/em><\/strong>. Yes, it was\u00a0<em>that<\/em>\u00a0good. But now, they said I\u2019m not allowed to kiss anymore. I\u2019m not even allowed to think about the kiss. Oturugbeke! This is an outrage! I need my attorney (<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/eknorspeak.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Luscious Ron<\/a><\/strong>) to do something about this immediately. Perhaps, we could appeal to God? If only God were to taste this kiss that I\u2019m referring to, He too will understand that resisting this kiss is impossicant.<\/p>\n<p>Okay, even if I manage to resist the kiss, how do I resist the thought of fantasizing about the kiss? Hmmmm. This must be the ploy of my enemies to get me to stop kissing, but they have failed. They want me to stop kissing, so they can start kissing my kisser abi?\u00a0<strong>**laughing in Igbo**<\/strong>\u00a0It will not work for them at alllll. I must get to the bottom of this no-kiss rule. How can I stay in the same room with the kisser and not be kissed? In fact, how can we coexist on the same earth and not kiss? Our lips are magnetic. I almost cannot help it, so technically it\u2019s not even my fault. I think I need to go and explain this to the Pastor.<\/p>\n<p>But in the meantime in between time, I need my dear attorney at law,\u00a0<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/eknorspeak.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Luscious Ron<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0to start preparing an appeal document to our Father in Heaven. He should please understand me\u2026. ehn. Dear God, please let me have this one little small sin.<\/p>\n<p><strong>UPDATE:<\/strong> I no longer need this little sin. Thank You, God.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This post was originally posted in March 2009, and I find it even more interesting now. Since I cannot commit to putting up an old picture of me every Thursday &#8211; not even on Instagram &#8211; I can at least put up old posts &#8211; not every Thursday though. Enjoy. ______________________________________ \u2026 My last kiss<a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/personal\/throwback-thursday-bless-me-father-for-i-have-kissed.html\" rel=\"nofollow\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":7388,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":{"twitter_14738191_14738191":""},"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[561],"tags":[229,6,54,163,827],"class_list":["post-7387","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-personal","tag-church","tag-funny","tag-god","tag-kissing","tag-tbt","entry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.2 - 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