{"id":462,"date":"2010-07-14T04:08:00","date_gmt":"2010-07-14T04:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/verastic.com.s96953.gridserver.com\/site\/?p=462"},"modified":"2024-02-27T21:55:16","modified_gmt":"2010-07-14T04:08:00","slug":"tossed-any-salads-lately","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/tossed-any-salads-lately.html","title":{"rendered":"Tossed Any Salads Lately?"},"content":{"rendered":"
At no point in time is anyone completely knowledgeable of everything in life.  If I did not know this before, I surely found out on Saturday.  During the Verastically Speakin’ Talk Radio<\/a><\/b> show on Saturday, the show topic was In The Name Of All Things Women<\/a><\/b>.  It was co-hosted by <\/b>, Ego Du Jour<\/a><\/b>, and Funmie<\/a><\/b>.  <\/b> asked us questions about women — like why we always say we’re virgins (who said we aren’t?<\/i>), why we say we’re not angry when we really are (that has never, ever happened!<\/i>), and why we take forever to get ready (because we can. Get with the program<\/i>).<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
Anyway, we did a good job of staying on the topic of the day until NaijaBloke<\/a><\/b> decided to ask, “Why do women say ‘eww’ when you tell them to teabag?”<\/b><\/i>  That was the beginning of confusion for me and Funmie<\/a><\/b>, especially since <\/b> and Ego Du Jour<\/a><\/b> both knew what it meant. We later found out what it means. If you don’t know what it means, go ahead and research it. I have no intention of defining it here.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
As if that wasn’t bad enough, NaijaBloke<\/a><\/b> (Yes, him again!<\/i>) asked about women and salad tossing<\/i>.  Again, Funmie<\/a><\/b> and I found ourselves at a complete loss. No matter how I tried to creatively and figuratively think about what else salad tossing could possibly stand for, all I could think of was this:<\/div>\n

<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/div>\n
As fate would have it (can I really thank fate for this?<\/i>), Mogaji<\/a><\/b> was there to explain it to us. Apparently, salad tossing is the act of eating\/sucking\/licking someone’s butt hole.  Now, please tell me, why would someone in their right mind eat, lick, suck — or even want to look at another person’s butt hole? We are indeed talking about the butt hole that shits and farts, right?  I have heard many things, but this one takes the cake.  It has gotten me all shaken up…. and positively disgusted.<\/div>\n
So many things have been running through my mind since I first heard this: In what position does the lickee stay while his\/her butt is being eaten or licked? What kind of pleasure does the licker derive from sticking his  head between someone’s naked butt cheeks. Finally, whose salad did NaijaBloke<\/a><\/b> toss (or who tossed his salad?)<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
That said, I still don’t know why they call it salad tossing. And no, I do not wish to find out.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
P.S.<\/b> The good news is that I won 8 out of the 15 categories I was nominated in for the Nigerian Blog Awards<\/a><\/b>. Thank you all for nominating and voting for me.  I really, really, really appreciate it. What would I do without you?<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
P.P.S.<\/b> Stay away from people’s butt holes.  It’s shitty in there.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

At no point in time is anyone completely knowledgeable of everything in life.  If I did not know this before, I surely found out on Saturday.  During the Verastically Speakin’ Talk Radio show on Saturday, the show topic was In The Name Of All Things Women.  It was co-hosted by , Ego Du Jour, andRead More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":{"twitter_14738191_14738191":""},"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[],"tags":[138],"class_list":["post-462","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","tag-sex","entry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nTossed Any Salads Lately? 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