{"id":430,"date":"2010-03-30T04:14:00","date_gmt":"2010-03-30T04:14:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/verastic.com.s96953.gridserver.com\/site\/?p=430"},"modified":"2010-03-30T04:14:00","modified_gmt":"2010-03-30T04:14:00","slug":"the-four-hour-erection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html","title":{"rendered":"The Four-Hour Erection"},"content":{"rendered":"
I don’t have it — with good reason.<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
But every time the Cialis or Viagra commercial comes on and says something like, “If you have an erection that lasts more than four hours, consult your doctor,” I cannot help but wonder what that feels and looks like.  And no, this is not a shy and subtle attempt at asking for pictures of four-hour erections.  <\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
Four hours is a long, long time.  It’s 240 minutes.  It’s 14, 400 seconds — of a man just sitting – or maybe standing – behind a hard place, doing what?  I’ve heard and read stories of men suffering from blue balls because they were turned on and weren’t given the <\/span>opportunity<\/span><\/i> to have a <\/span>plunging relief<\/span><\/i> of their <\/span>tension<\/span><\/i>.  <\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
The times I’ve heard and read such stories, they did not sound as if the man was standing, doing nothing, admiring the stiffness that threatened to put a hole in his pants.  Or his mattress, if he was lying face-down on the bed.  But I assume that such a position would be as comfortable as a pregnant woman lying on her stomach.  Of course, if he was not wearing any pants or underwear, the threat of a hole in them would be null and void.  Impossible.<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
If a man were to be patient enough to let four hours of hardness pass him by, he ought to be efficient.  There are many things that could be, should be done with the hard instrument.  Pounding yams, grinding pepper, staring a hot pot of soup, using it as a pin and needle holder, and hitting a nail.  These are just a few creative ideas that Cialis and Viagra should consider adding to their commercials.  Although it’d be fancy seeing a man walk into the clinic with his emotions on his loins.<\/span><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/div>\n
And if you’re wondering what on earth has gotten into me, quite honestly, I’m not sure.  I need a breakthrough.<\/span><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I don’t have it — with good reason. But every time the Cialis or Viagra commercial comes on and says something like, “If you have an erection that lasts more than four hours, consult your doctor,” I cannot help but wonder what that feels and looks like.  And no, this is not a shy andRead More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":{"twitter_14738191_14738191":""},"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[],"tags":[6,56],"class_list":["post-430","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","tag-funny","tag-men","entry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe Four-Hour Erection - Verastic<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Vera Ezimora\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html\",\"name\":\"The Four-Hour Erection - Verastic\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2010-03-30T04:14:00+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/2c1b7969fbea03a45b97d54a5228cc1a\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/social\/the-four-hour-erection.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"The Four-Hour Erection\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/\",\"name\":\"Verastic\",\"description\":\"Recklessly authentic.\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/2c1b7969fbea03a45b97d54a5228cc1a\",\"name\":\"Vera Ezimora\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f6c1e19c23a08351aab97f35d3ca650f0b87e7e96937f85baf0faf6e0834bc51?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f6c1e19c23a08351aab97f35d3ca650f0b87e7e96937f85baf0faf6e0834bc51?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Vera Ezimora\"},\"description\":\"I mean, I'm a lot of things - a Writer, Blogger, Speaker, Vlogger, Content Creator, Storyteller, Truth-Sayer, Milk-Lover, Yogurt-Addict, Entrepreneur, Daughter, Wife, Mom, & Nwa Jesu. 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