Oh ye, African men. Where were you when this German woman kidnapped your African brother, locked him up for 36 hours, and then forced him to have sex with her over and over? Please continue reading to find out how you missed out.<\/p>\n
So, she was on her way back from a sex addiction clinic in Munich, and it was then that she met this African brother, your brother. She invited him over to her house, and it was there that she kept him hostage and forced him to satisfy all her sexual demands. I mean, all her sexual demands. Picture that. Thirty-six hours later, she fell asleep and that was when he managed to escape. He was found weeping on the street – by police. Weeping!<\/p>\n
He told police, \u201cI met her on a bus. She invited me back here. It was hell. I can\u2019t walk. Please help me.\u201d<\/em>\u00a0Can’t walk, huh? After the police confirmed his ordeal, they took the woman into a hospital for psychiatric evaluation. And this is very good because she was on her way from a sex addiction clinic the day she met and kidnapped your African brother. So the treatment must be working.<\/p>\n By the way, this is not her first offense. Last time, she kidnapped a man, she forced him to have sex with her eight times. As in, eight whole times! Where are all those men that say, I can go for hours?<\/em> Just like this your African brother, he was able to escape when she fell asleep. \u00a0This woman sef falls asleep too much. \u00a0And when he told the cops about it, the cops went to pay her a visit, you know, to interrogate her and stuff. She invited them in for a quickie. Funny how this report doesn’t say if they accepted her request or not. Wanna bet?<\/p>\n But here’s the part of the story that was not reported (which I have completely imagined, but believe to be completely true nonetheless). When your African brother got invited by this woman back to his house, he quickly checked a few vital things. Fresh breath:<\/strong> check!<\/em> \u00a0Condom:<\/strong> check!<\/em> Wait, more than one condom though:<\/strong> Oh, check!!!<\/em> Then he called his fellow African brothers and said, “Oh, boy! I don hammer!! E get this Oyibo babe wey I just meet now, now, wey say make I follow am waka house. I go kpansh am die!” <\/em>(Yes, I do realize that not all Africans speak this way, but for the purpose of this post, we will believe that we all do).<\/p>\n And then, his fellow African brothers will giggle with excitement and envy, wondering why such goodluck did not fall upon them instead. And they would imagine every vain thing: what position will she take? Is she thin or fat? What does her lady part smell like – fish, onions, or rose petals? For the sake of their fantasy, they’ll go with the rose petals. Does she know how to take it from the back? Can she ride? Will she moan or scream? Will she speak gibberish or will she call the name of her god? More giggling.<\/p>\n