Ok, I’m sure you’re probably wondering what nephew I’m talking about since I never told you I was expecting a nephew. Well, of course, I didn’t. Abi you want to use your witch to put juju on him? Abeg, waka go. Ok seriously, my nephew has been born. His father is my cousin.<\/p>\n
My cousin’s name is Uzo, but I call him Lil Uzo. He’s not little (of course), but his father (my father’s older brother) is also Uzo. So instead of calling them “Uzo Senior” and “Uzo Junior”, we call them “Big Uzo” and “Lil Uzo”. Lil Uzo’s wife(Natasha) is from Reunion Island, near Mauritius Island and Madagascar…yes, such a place (Madagascar) exists. I’m saying so because when I told dumb-ass Uju that my sister in-law is from Madagascar, she said “there’s such a place?! I thought it was made up for that animated movie called ‘Madagascar'”. So if you’re thinking Uju is a dumbass, then yes, I wholly agree with you.<\/p>\n
Anyways….back to Lil Uzo and his new fatherhood. Uzo is soooo foine. In fact, if he weren’t my cousin, I would……well, let’s leave that alone. He’s such an international man. Lemme explain. His father is Nigerian = black (my dad’s older brother), his mother is German = white. Lil Uzo lived in Jos (Plateau State) till he graduated high school. Then he left for Germany. Then he left for Russia (med skool). Then he left for Paris (business skool), and now, he is in Luxemberg (working). He speaks English, pigeon english, some Igbo, German, Russian, and French. And if you’re wondering, his wife speaks French….and English. The baby’s name is Joaquim Odera Ezimora.<\/p>\n
Why am I telling you all about Lil Uzo’s not-so-little life? Told you I can’t shut up.<\/p><\/div>\n
Can you believe that in this summer heat I am drinking a cup of hot tea? Yes oh, I have a sore throat. I believe I drank way too many cold drinks on saturday (@ the cookout). My house kinda feels like winter right now anyway cause the air conditioner has been on full blast…which is very unlike my mother. She usually complains of being cold, while I complain of being hot, but this time, she’s hot and I’m cold. What is wrong with this picture? My house is so cold that I have even brought my blanket out …. in the middle of friggin’ July! So you can imagine how cold my house is. I guess it would be in my best interest to put some real clothes on instead of tying a wrapper around all. I’m so lazy mehn. Dressing up is a chore for me. I walk around the house naked all day; by now, I’m sure my neighbours already know how much hair I have in my coochie.<\/p>\n
Speaking of hair, I’ve been thinking about getting a Brazillian wax. What say you? I don’t think I’m ready for it though…since I heard it’s really, really painful. Maybe I’ll do it before I have a baby; that way the child would have a “clear” pathway when he\/she is coming in. My mother had me thru CS, so I didn’t have to pass thru my mama’s coochie. Maybe next time.<\/p>\n
Anyways, that’s if for now. We go yarn later.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Ok, I’m sure you’re probably wondering what nephew I’m talking about since I never told you I was expecting a nephew. Well, of course, I didn’t. Abi you want to use your witch to put juju on him? Abeg, waka go. Ok seriously, my nephew has been born. His father is my cousin. My cousin’sRead More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":{"twitter_14738191_14738191":""},"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[1222],"class_list":["post-112","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-vl","tag-vl","entry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nMy Nephew Has Been Born!!! - Verastic<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/vl\/my-nephew-has-been-born.html\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Vera Ezimora\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/vl\/my-nephew-has-been-born.html\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/vl\/my-nephew-has-been-born.html\",\"name\":\"My Nephew Has Been Born!!! - Verastic\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2006-07-28T03:21:00+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/2c1b7969fbea03a45b97d54a5228cc1a\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/vl\/my-nephew-has-been-born.html#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/vl\/my-nephew-has-been-born.html\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/vl\/my-nephew-has-been-born.html#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"My Nephew Has Been Born!!!\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/\",\"name\":\"Verastic\",\"description\":\"Recklessly authentic.\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/2c1b7969fbea03a45b97d54a5228cc1a\",\"name\":\"Vera Ezimora\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/verastic.com\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f6c1e19c23a08351aab97f35d3ca650f0b87e7e96937f85baf0faf6e0834bc51?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f6c1e19c23a08351aab97f35d3ca650f0b87e7e96937f85baf0faf6e0834bc51?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Vera Ezimora\"},\"description\":\"I mean, I'm a lot of things - a Writer, Blogger, Speaker, Vlogger, Content Creator, Storyteller, Truth-Sayer, Milk-Lover, Yogurt-Addict, Entrepreneur, Daughter, Wife, Mom, & Nwa Jesu. 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