Well, first, Durex sells their condoms to Nigerian women. Then, they bring them all back and ask them who they used the condoms with: their partners? Or their assistant partners? It appears that a whopping 62% of Nigerian women are unfaithful to their partners. There’s only one question on my mind right now: who are these women? And when can I meet them, so they can show me the way!
Okay, so according to the survey that was conducted by Durex condoms, most Nigerian women are cheats. Because I am a saint above all saints, *adjusts halo* it is clear that I have never done something like this. However, I cannot help but defend my fellow woman-kind. Durex may have told us that 62% of Nigerian women are unfaithful, but Durex didn’t give us the fine print.
I am here to give you the fine print:
1. Durex did not define what it means to be unfaithful. Are we talking emotionally, physically, or financially?
2. If it was emotional, was it love or infatuation? Cause infatuation does not count!
3. If it was physical (sexual), did the penis go all the way in, or was it just at the tip? The tip doesn’t count.
4. If the penis went all the way in during intercourse, did she orgasm or not? If she did not orgasm, it does not count.
5. Were the women in actual relationships with their partners or were they just talking with them? Cause you know that makes a difference.
6. If it was financial, was any part of the money she took from her assistant partner spent on her partner? If so, it does not count as cheating.
7. Were their partners cheating, too? If not, had they ever cheated? If the answer to either question is yes, then it does not count as cheating on the part of the woman. It is simply payback.
8. When 62% of Nigerian women are cheating on their partners, what does that say about their men? (This argument cannot be used when the case is reversed and the man is the cheat).
9. Why should we even trust a company that makes slippery balloons for the penis?
If it is indeed true that 62% of Nigerian women are cheats, then so be it. Maybe our men will finally believe that whatever they do, we can do it, too – sometimes even better. The issue now is how to develop an app that will curb these women’s appetite – if it is true what this survey says. But I seriously doubt it.
If Durex can at least dash these cheating women some free condoms so they can sex safely, that would be greatly appreciated.
P.S. It is now 23 days before I unveil myself. Wooooooooooooot!
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Nne, the cheating levels is incomprehensible. I won’t believe until I see the raw data, lol…
Myne: I’m with you. But I demand more than raw data. I have to even see the cheating women while they’re in the act. Until then …!
….the fact that you wanna sit in on said events though, Vera!! O_O *adjusts YOUR halo!* LOL
Udee, it’s not what it looks/sounds like. I can explain. You see, I only want to watch it just to confirm that what durex said is indeed true. Nothing else oh! *readjusts halo*
hahahaha…d tip does not count?
hahahaha!!..vera! really? d tip does not count?
LOL. Yes oooo! The tip does not count for nothing! Oh, you didn’t know, ehn?
Companies are eternally conflating statistics for that shock value. They know what they’re doing…just getting their brand name out there on everyone’s lips puts them ahead of the competition anyway!
And how do we know such women are telling the truth (a)…. and (b) which Nigerian husband would agree to use a condom with their wife in the first place?! *side eye Durex…we’re ahead of you!*
Udee: What???? Nigerian husbands won’t use a condom with their wives??? Why didn’t anyone tell me this before? *runs off to make a written note* The first thing I need to do right now is buy myself some Durex condoms and see who I will naturally want to use it with 😀
LOL…
3-4 though?!
I’d like to know the answers now…
LOL. Mikki, anything is possible! Don’t you know? Anyway, I’m still waiting for the answers too.
Sigh. We are still at this. What everyone should be talking about is how to get a flipping apology from Durex ’cause their statistics is void. How can they carry out a survey on 29000 people in 36 countries and believe that this dataset represents population of each countries. if you divide 29000 by 36, you will get 805.5. So are they saying that they carried out the survey on 805.5 people in each country?? Now put into consideration the population for each country. for instance, Nigeria has over 150 million, if they should carry out a survey on dataset of 29000 people in Nigeria alone, it’s still not sufficient to represent the demography. Now put into consideration the other nations’ population. it is even impossible to analyse 805.5 people. Durex should provide the data and tell the world how many women took part in the survey from each country. Even after they put out the data, my analysis falsifies their survey. Their statistics would be rejected in any academia or intellectual settings or contribution because their dataset is quite little and insufficient to represent such a huge amount of population. They are just sensationalising their void survey result to sell more condoms. They deliberately and carefully chose the nations to rank. Nigeria won’t complain or sue them for defamation hence they rank us as number 1. How pathetic.
UniqueLati, honestly the thing tire me. I could not even bother being offended with the alleged survey. I was [still am] amused, more than anything else.
Durex is very very STUPID *hiss*
anyhoo… i dont agree… their findings are null, void and cannot hold water abeg.
and the above said is my 2 kobo…. *moving right along*
Funmie, why do you seem so angry? Seems like Durex has hit close to home for you, ehn? Like maybe you’ve cheated or are cheating AND Durex is your chosen weapon of sin? Hmmmmmmmmmm. 😐
6. If it was financial, was any part of the money she took from her assistant partner spent on her partner? If so, it does not count as cheating.
7. Were their partners cheating, too? If not, had they ever cheated? If the answer to either question is yes, then it does not count as cheating on the part of the woman. It is simply payback.
Vera, I agree with you here. Completely..lolssssssssssss. Imagine if these women had completed the survey….maybe we’ll be talking 75% sef
Ginger: Hahahahaha. I know, right? More like 85% sef! But it’s true nah. If she was collecting money from someone other than her main man and she was using the money to support her main man, then that doesn’t count jare! And the pay back one, yes, I’m sooo for it. *coughs and adjusts halo*
It took durex to bring out such report?
1. Durex is a company that makes profit from having people having sex. If they are making a kill in Nigeria and know how sensitive Nigerians are to “statements” they wouldn’t say so. Unless of course they are not making profits and need to get a stirring in the people to get the word “durex” stuck to their minds and therefore increase sexual activities… Marketing strategies.
2. If a sample was made and said Nigerian women are the most faithful… Would there be really such complain, nagging or comments?
3. Just between you and I (Nigerian Family) we all know the truth… We don’t need durex to speak.
4. For a known fact you can go to Thailand, East African countries and so on and have sexual encounters with a completely different woman after every meal, every day and cost you only pennies…
In UK it is a well known fact within the brotherhood that the woman can be picked up like laser targeted missiles. The heat is really on. However not necessarily after money but to get married… security.
If information on sexual explosion, the past 25 years wasn’t streamed to Africa… would our Women just be the old stay virgin till married and stick to the “missionary position” like a log while the man does the pushing? Hmmm
Do you know the amount of Nigerian women on sex sites.. check the statistics on sites like Adult friend finder or casual date. Forget even eHarmony or match… those are full of scammers and rejects.
Our women have decided to go AWOL and we men are left with the understanding that our rapidly disintegrating culture and masked religious affiliation makes us look beyond them to others…
Otherwise perhaps, just perhaps, durex has a point…
Durex is just entertaining us and trying to sell their market. That’s what I think.
Durex is just entertaining us and trying to sell their market. That’s what I think.
I dont really have much reckoning with durex, just wondering the stirring about condoms and Nigerian Women….
Its got weight, as in the way our women can “so many times2 let go of their upbringing and go haywire especially those away from the watchful eyes of family, friends and citizens.
UK has slowly but steadily become an ease for picking up Nigerian women for “bang slam activites”.
Never in my life would I have thought Nig woman are classified to be so wow into sick things like oral sex! And this woman are quick to slither into areas like doms, fetish, swingers and so on…
The amount of married women (esp Nigerian women) having sexual encounters via sex sites and when their hubbies are off to work/business trips, you will be amazed.
Perhaps this is why durex is upset… the report a fabrication? To get their products back on shelves as it seems these sexual exploits dont really need condoms.