Best lifestyle & humor blog. Ever.
There’s a saying that you attract what you want or what you are or something like that. So I’m starting to think that this is the reason why I attract the most interesting people. Let me tell you about Kemi (not her real name). She has a tall, handsome husband and three very good looking kids – all below six years old. Recently, I hung out with Kemi and her husband was not home. When I asked about him, she {Read More}
I’m sure we all know what condoms are used for, right? They are used to reduce the risk of unwanted pregnancies and the spread of sexually-transmitted diseases – which I also assume are unwanted. However, while most things change, the condom hasn’t changed in the past 50 years. And Bill Gates doesn’t like this. So the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation is offering $100,000 of initial funding to anyone who designs the “next generation of condoms.” If the design is {Read More}
Meet Louise and Martine, identical twins, 70 years old, Red Light District employees, and retired. Louise and Martine have been working as prostitutes for over 50 years, and between them both, they have had about 355,000 men. They say they’ve been working because they need the money and the government pension is too small to live of off. But now they’re retiring because they’re suffering from arthritis and having a hard time attracting new clients. Well, that’s weird. I don’t {Read More}
Andrew Wardle was born without a penis; he was born with his bladder outside his body – a condition known as an ectopic bladder. This condition is quite rare, happens to about one in thirty million men. His friends don’t know that he has this condition, and he has managed to keep it a secret, until now that’s he coming out of the closet and sharing his story. He has a tube connected from his bladder to help him pee. {Read More}
If you have been following the show, The Bachelor, then you know that the current bachelor is a religious man. His name is Sean Lowe, and he is a born again virgin. When I first heard this, I thought it meant that he’s a born again AND a virgin. But apparently, that’s not what it actually means. Being a born again virgin means that you are a born again, and you do not indulge in pre-marital sex anymore. The average {Read More}
What kind of world would we be living in if we did not have toasters that print penises and vaginas on our bread? Sacrilege! The people at Breakfast In Bed have created a toaster that does magic. You put your bread into the toaster and it comes out with a toasted-on penis or vagina. I’m assuming that one slice of bread comes out with the penis, and the other comes out with the vagina. There are even toasters for gay {Read More}
I know that all kinds of crazy things happen in this world, and in spite of how many crazy things I have read and written about, I never really stop being shocked. So here comes the robot sex thing: according to a study, women who have longer orgasms tend to live longer. This isn’t just about how many orgasms a woman has, but also about how long they last. The longer, the better. Apparently, “[Sexbots will] be more desirable, patient, {Read More}
The thing about orgasms is that everyone wants one. I don’t think anyone wants to start the process of sex and not get to that happy point. The happy point is the whole point of the sex in the first place, isn’t it? So keeping that in mind, you would understand why 24 year old Racquel Gonzalez of Florida got violently pissed off after her boyfriend, 30 year old Esric Davis climaxed without her. The nerves! Naturally, she did what {Read More}
Apparently, konji is on the office rise. Who knew? There’s a new report that office sex has increased by 73% since last year. Seventy-three flippin percent! Not only is there an increase, there is also apparently a reason for the increase. It is because of cell phones. Those little evil gadgets. See, because everyone uses a cell phone and carries it to work, there is a lot of communication between coworkers and between employees and their partners. Texts. Sexts. And {Read More}
That man up there, his name is Patrick Louis Linn, and he has been arrested – again – for having sex with horses. He was first arrested in 2010 for the same crime. And he went to the same barn to rape a horse. There is no word on whether he raped the same horse. The horse he raped recently was named Sunny. Sunny?? As in a guy horse? What category of gayness shall we put this under? {Read More}
