Let’s Go There….!

Naija Blogger Awards is up…yay! I am not dedicating an entire post to the awards because I’m tryna create awareness & all that ish, but rather because I want to warn all of you: failure to vote for me will result in the permanent deletion of my blog. Yes, I realize this action will hurt me more than it will hurt you since I love and cherish my blog and its contents, but at least, my point will be made.

So what makes Vera – the one who lives Verastically – qualify? Please, read on. There are 17 categories for ‘Category A’ of the Naija Blogger Awards, and I intend to qualify for all of them. Yes, I said all of them.

1. Best Personal Blog: This shouldn’t be difficult. Verastically Livin’ is as personal as it can get. I have told you about my bathing routine (so now, you can practically picture me doing it); I have told you about my tropical rain forest (the jungle that hides within); I have told you about my shotput days (when I supplied free manure to grandma’s farm); I have told you about my lactose intolerance (so now you know what not to serve me when I visit you), and I have even told you what kind of underwears I wear. What, do you need me to post a picture of my butt cheeks too?

2. Best Student Blog: So maybe I don’t talk a lot about school, but I did mention that I had to do a school project when I had to visit a strip club and observe people. Well, what more do you want from me? Vote me there jare!

3. Most Inspiring Blogger: I inspired Temite, Funmie, and someone else whose name I can’t remember right now to start blogging. How much more of an inspiring blogger do you want me to be? On February 14th, I even inspired God to answer my prayers and send me my Valentine. Hehehe. If I can inspire God, then what da heck?? If you ask me, I’ll even say I inspired Barack Obama to run 4 President, but let’s not get in2 that. We’re keeping it on the down low.

4. Best Literary Blog (prose, poetry, story telling): Uhm, this might be a bit tricky. The stories I have told on Verastically Livin’ are not exactly prose-type material BUT hey, they are stories nonetheless, no? Remember the story about the young boy who woulda wooed me if he wasn’t so much younger than me? Well, that counts for something!

5. Best Use Of Theme In A Blog (religion, politics, social commentary, fashion, family, etc): How about “Totally Awesome” for a theme? If you ask me, that should count for something. And that is exactly what Verastically Livin’ is all about. Someone might call this tooting my own horns, but what does he know?

6. Best Political Blog: Oh, this one is soooooo easy! On the day of the election, I blogged TWICE. I never, ever blog twice in a day, but that day I blogged twice – all for Obama. The posts are HERE & HERE. Now how’s that for best political blog!!

7. Best Relgious Blog: I don’t like the term ‘religious;’ I prefer ‘spiritual,’ but for the purpose of this award, I’ll tell you that this is the best religious blog because on Sunday, October 19th, I rededicated my life to Christ. I also have a direct line to God. Who else has written a letter to Him and had it answered so swiftly and perfectly?

8. Best Fashion Blog: On Valentine’s Day, I told you I wore a pink and black shirt. I only wore the pink shirt because it was Valentine’s Day and I was tryna honor St. Valentine.

9. Best Entertainment Blog: Who else entertains you so much with the type of weird men she meets? Remember Mr. Kisser? TAB? Mr. Multiple Personality? Mr Slow? The Delivery Man? The weekend with three men – all of whom were either married, almost married, and probably married?

10. Best Everyday Read: By qualifying for categories one to nine, I automatically qualify for this one. It’s no hard ball.

11. Most Creative Blogger: Me, of course! I came up with “Verastic” all by myself. I named Funmi “Fufustic” also (because I call her Fufu for short). And of course, I came up with the beautiful name that all of you are supposed to call me – Madam Interviewee Vera. Needless to say, you’re doing a sucky job @ it. And one of these days, I’ll shut all your blogs down.

12. Intellectual Blog: I know how to spell everyone’s blogger/blogville name without looking. It’s not easy, but what can I say? I have a rather high blogville IQ.

13. Dedicated Blogger Award (updates most frequently, comments, active blogger….): If you have not noticed, Verastically Livin’ gets updated every three days (except for a few times when I have to delay because I need to update on a particular date. I am committed, darn it!

14. Most Likeable Blogger: I like myself, and that is all that should matter. The rest of you better get on board…. or else!! Yeap, I’m deleting Verastically Livin’ and going to a far away land where I’ll be known as the green-eyed one – Facebook.

15. Best Use Of Visuals In A Blog (images, themes, colors…etc): Every word you see in color in this post is a link. Do you have ANY idea how long it took me to hyperlink all these words???? Do you???? Well, that counts as visuals. That’s my story & I’m sticking to it!

16. Best Use Of Media In A Blog (widgets, graphics, music…): Well, I have the ‘Follow Verastic’ widget, the ‘Subscribe to Verastic’ widget, and even the ‘View My Complete Profile’ widget. What more do you want?

17. Bloggers’ Choice Awards (Naija blogger of the year): How many other bloggers have taken their time to put up this type of post? It is obvious I deserve this. Now, give it!

By now, I’m sure there is only one question on your mind: where do I cast my Verastic vote? Right HERE. The administrators require that no category be left blank, so please fill everything in. On a serious note, if you do not know which blogger to nominate for a category, just put ‘N/A’ or something like that. But don’t leave it blank. This voting is open to any1 & everyone, so come one, come all.

I exit now……. to go & work on my acceptance speech.

*Vera singing* … Winner oh oh oh, winner/winner oh oh oh oh winner/Vera you don win oh, winner/kpata kpata you go win forever, winner!

*Another song* It shall be permanent/it shall be permanent/what the Lord has done for me/it shall be permanent….permanent…..

Reading this has inducted you as a Sweet Potato and a member of Elders' Council of Verastic. Please don't forget to share this post and subscribe below for more awesomeness.

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  1. Temite says

    pink satin – go and WORK or something…or go to BED.
    Vera – well this award dey do u something enh. ok I am off to go vote boo.

  2. ochuko says

    Ok Ok, u’ve made ur point.. u’ve scared me to vote for u…
    ..Ok, u’ve convinced me to vote for u…
    nice one.. my 1st time here.. and i’m hooked :)

  3. Vera Ezimora says

    Pink Satin: Congrats on being first. And thank you 4 ur votes too. I wan carry all the awards oh. Y not, if not??

    Bumight: Look, don’t start with me oo! See pot calling kettle black. lol. lol @ Pink Satin going 2 bed.

    Temite: Hehehehe. My dear, e get as e dey do me, do me, do me, do me, do me. LOL. I had you in my votes too.

    Danny Bagucci: I know say money no dey, but still, I wan pack all of them carry go. Y not, if not? LOL.

    Ochuko: LOL. Thanks, darling! Now that I know that scare tactics work, I will make sure I do it more often.

  4. Vera Ezimora says

    Ms O: I told you to vote then I will send your perf immediately. How can you be charging me 4 services that are yet 2 be rendered?? You sef, check am na!

  5. webround says

    so all you want is to qualify, abi get nominated? that one no be problem. we will nominate you for all the categories. it does not mean we have to vote for you in all of them, after all you did not ask for that. and since you’re talking about being religious, remember the Bible says – you have not cos you ask not.

  6. Funms-the rebirth says

    infact due to ur arguing points above, i give u all my nominations……. esp for the best student blog cuz that ur project no easy at all o……. so have u bought ur dress for the awards? watch oscar re runs to get inspiration and i will always be here to help u o

  7. Shubby Doo says

    vote vera for all?…yikes…hahaha…only you vera…onyl u…lol…you have one of my nominations not saying which but i would be very suprised if you didn’t win one of the awards!

    mehn i know what you mean about those coloured hyperlinks…it aint easy o!

  8. RocNaija says

    If only Obama had run this kinda campaign! He’d have sown up the presidency in 2004!!

    No worries.. I’ll get his people to call your people.. That’s how I roc *wink*

    As long as me gets a pic with celebrity on the red carpet.. votes are in the bag.

  9. Enkay says

    hehehe! I wish I could really laugh out loud but i’m still in the office….I’l save it for later. lol!

    Even before you started ‘campaigning’, I already voted for you. but you know, nuthin’ goes for nuthin’ *wink*

  10. simplidivine says

    rotfl..read some of ur blog, i think u r really funny..have u considered a change in career paths?? U cld be d next great stand up comic..will definitely keep reading..oh n goodluck with d awards..lol



    After reading this post and shedding these tears in laughter, I do believe that you and you alone should win every award. And here I was pushing you for funniest blogger. How could I forget how ‘fashionable’ and religious, and political, and widget friendly you and your blog are.

    Alright off to campaign for ytou seriously. ‘Vera for Everything’

    Biko, I don laugh tyah! kai!

  12. The Life of a Stranger called me says

    In fact because of you, I will go and vote your name…… keep singing it nne, you have already won in my eyes.

  13. Olufunke says

    Vera!!!! na wa for you o!
    You are capaigning?
    but you know you are missing somethign out…what is your mandate? what are you promising us, if we vote for you?
    but you know Vera will be best everything….even politics, poet, religious, sporty etc…everything for Vera, Vera for eveything…..
    You gat no probs

    How are you doing?

  14. Good Naija Girl says

    You’re mad! But the good news is now we all know what name to put in all 17 categories!

    Good luck with the awards sha…get your speech(es) ready!

  15. Miss Iyabo Opeke says

    In fact, why are we nominating anyone sef, wey d winner is starin’ us right in our face as none other than the World Greatest…*Verastic* [Case Closed]…

    U are just too much…Jill of all trade…Most especially, one blogger who has refused…I write ‘refused’ to retire like other old blogger who have ja commot from BlogVille…
    We add that also to the list of award…go figure!!!

    @Pink-Satin:eeh heh! na ‘ere u dey…!!!

  16. Vera Ezimora says

    Arewa: Thank you, jare! So ehm….tell me more about this bribe. I'm willing to do whatever it takes. Tell me!

    Mike: Hahahaha. Believe in yourself. Like you said, God dey *Vera rolling eyes* Hehehehe

    Webround: Look! Stop this your too-much-English ooo! The nomination season is the Primaries, so first I have to get nominated abi? After that, the GENERAL ELECTION ensues – which is when I will need da votes. As 4 that your bible quotation, it does not apply 2 me. Mind urself ooo! lol

    Funms: Thank you very much, sister Funms. I will now embark on a journey of watching Oscar reruns. I must look FABULOUS!! You know now!!! Hehehe.

    Shubby Doo: I guess I could manage one vote. lol. If you ask me, I'll prefer all the votes ooo! But if you insist on making it just one, then who am I to argue? LOL. And yes, those hyperlinks r sooo not funny!

    RocNaija: That's how you roc abi? Okay, yes get Obama's people 2 call my people. Tell the it's urgent. So which celeb do you want??? Talk quick make I deliver.

    Enkay: True talk, my sister. True talk indeed. Worry not; your actions will not go unrewarded. Laugh out loud all you want ooo! Wetin dem fit do you 4 work?? lol

    Afrobabe: In short ehn, I no fit oo! Even if they get 'freakiest blog' sef, I go over qualify for that category too. No try me ooo! lol.

    SimpliDivine: Thank you, darling!! And no oh, I have not considered being a standup comic. A shy chic like me? lol. No oh. I'll pee on myself. Thanx 4 reading.

    Rita: LOL! I'm glad I have. I'm glad I did this post then.

    Solomon Sydelle: Hahahahaha. Do I detect some sarcasm in your words? LOL! Mind yoursef o! Shey it's because your own blog is not as political, religious, and widget friedly as mine abi? Is that why you're hating on a sistuh? LOL. Go & cast your vote oh jare!

    The Life Of A Stranger: Hehehehe. Thank you, my love. I've always known I could count on you. I shall continue to sing and dance.

    Olufunke: Ah, you're right oo! I did forget to mention what I will do if you vote 4 me. Well, that's because I figured you all will know I am just the absolute BEST! Pesin no better pass me oo. I'm doing good anyway. U?

    Good Naija Girl: LOL. Yes, I may be mad, but like you rightly said, now we know what name to put in ALL categories. Yes, ke! I'm preparing my speech ooo!

    Naija Blogger Awards: You're welcome, darling. LOL. Anything 4 u. As 4 what Blogville will be without me… I dunno oo! I have asked myself the same question several times and have been unable to come up with an answer. lol

    Ibiluv: Well, we'll see. If I win something, I fit share am. I'm not a stingy person….unless we're talking about certain other things, of course. Hehehe.

    Tobenna: LOL! Hahaha. Nwa nne'm nwoke, dalu oo! I throway salute for your side. Make sure say you go vote ooo!

    WriteFreak: Tufia kwa! I no go kill you oo. You must live and not die (so you can read more Verastic posts) lol. Per FB, babe, I am sooo sorry. I have neglected FB so much. I've been going there 2 approve friends & that's it. But now that you have mentioned it, I must return. I apologize.

    Miss Iyabo Opeke: Hahahahaha. Babe, I luff your spirit die! In short, I throway yansh 4 you. We need more people like you on Blogville. Ah ah! I'm the Jill of all trades ey? Yes, ke! Y shall I shy? lol.

    Aloofar: LOL. Hahaha. My dear, don't count yourself out too quickly ooo. U fit contest small (although I hope to win still. LOL)

  17. ShonaVixen says

    Veraaaaaaaa…i bet even the Honorary Naija u want no? Aaah well, I guess i’ll just have to sulk in away…this Zimbabwean girl is now upset!!!!

  18. Nefertiti says

    u are going to have to do more for me to vote u in all categories o. All dis lobbying no go work. What will you give me?

  19. Funmie says

    just fir the records.. i was one of the first pple to read this post but errrrrrrrrmmmm some [pple left acomment before me.. y’ll need to get a JOB.

    anyhoo.. due to popular demands of my comment on here… i am back sha.
    out of all u said Vera, the only part that interset me is this….”Someone might call this tooting my own horns, but what does HE know?”
    * coughs* who/what is he?
    by the way, i already voted n i prolly have you for 10 out of the 15 categories…. seriously, who else do i really know on blogville.
    peace o jare.
    Funmie Jukwesi adamama ( did i spell dat rite?)

  20. ChiefO says

    lol. na WAR o. but i understand where MIV is comin from sha. she must bigzz. and wat better way or place to start than blogville.

  21. The experiences of an achiever....... says

    ahn ahn..Madam Interviewee Vera, desperate much??????????????????????
    we will vote o! so u don’t die..lol! and @ Pink Satin..don’t despair we’ll vote u too as FIRST! lmao!!
    Me sef..I Deserve a vote..as most ehn ehn(scratches head) MIA – her wittiness blogger! so all of una vote me too!!!! (no be only Vera we fit campaign o!)

  22. The experiences of an achiever....... says

    Ok people, I have done my research..u can vote me for d *SAY WHAT (random blogger) category* get to voting!!! lol! winner oh oh oh…..

  23. IgoTalk says

    Vera na wa for you oh! Ok…now that you have practically left us with no reasons NOT to vote for you, shall I volunteer (naija style) to round up ‘awon boys’ to ‘collect’ ballot boxes and take them to that place :-)

  24. Vera Ezimora says

    NaijaGirl: I fit handle am o! Wetin dey there sef? Whatever it is, I can handle it. No be me again?

    Shona: Here’s the funny thing: I only found out like last week that you’re not Naija. How in the world did that happen?! I think you’re from the wrong country, gal! You’re obviously one of us. lol. I was too ashamed last week to admit that I had just found out. And uhm, yes, I want the honorary naija award too, please.

    Kafo: Mba oh. I no fit share @ alllll. I can let you blog about my victory, but that’s as far as I’m willing to go in all of this.

    Nefertiti: What is it that you want? Just tell me, darling. You should know by now that I am equal to the task, so name it, and it will be yours.

    Funmie: Thanx 4 the vote, hon. The spelling is jukwa ese adama ama. I think Per your question (about the guy), I'm sorry, but I don't know what/who you're talking about. You must have my blog confused for someone else's blog. *rolling eyes*

    Rethots: What does your heart desire? Name it, and it will be yours. Abi you no trust me again?

    Chief: You sef, you know now! I gats to be big! I gats to be a bisgal. lol. Ehen, so go & vote me in abeg.

    Buttercup: It's okay, honey. I do tend to have that effect on people. Hehehe.

    Miss Iyabo: You're trying my patience ooo. Sebi it's because I'm shining too much teeth? Forget Verastic ke? Lai lai.

    Isi: You're welcome, boo! And thanx 4 the vote. Please, feel free to vote more than once.

    Experiences of an Achiever: U no dey fear ooo! How you come on top a whole Verastic blog come dey campaign for your own vote? No dey try that kin rough play o! lol. Oya, go & vote 4 me quickly I vex kpata kpata.

    Igo Talk: LOL. My dear, I no kuku mind ooo! As long as this your move go ensure my victory. Abi you need some financial help? I fit shake body o

  25. geisha says

    madam vera, abeg change that voting link sharp sharp if you want your vote to get counted oh!!!
    just direct your loyal fans to the website instead of the nomination link for your bestest good!! lol

  26. Vera Ezimora says

    Original Mgbeke: Oya, please now. Nne, biko nu. Biko… my darling!

    Geisha: Ehm….why is that??? Gimme one reason why I must direct my voters to the other link. You musto beg me.

  27. geisha says

    this one had a limit that had already been exceeded, so any other votes coming in here would be lost.

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